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               “Jan & Linda”
 
His shadow cast over her,
As she sat there,
Looking up at what was,
The 3rd guy,
In the last hour,
To come over to their table,
And ask if he could,
Buy them a drink.
The first two,
Couldn’t stop their eyes,
From taking a bit of a ride,
Up and down her body,
As much as was possible,
From a mere,
3-feet away.
Her friend Linda,
Was not use,
To all this male attention,
They were receiving,
And wanted to say yes,
To both the other two guys,
Offer of a drink.
But Jan knew better,
There was always that catch,
That unwritten rule,
That you have to be,
Social with them,
At the very least,
For the rest of the night.
And Jan knew,
It was much too early,
In the night,
To get caught in that trap.
But this guy was trying,
A new approach,
With them though.
He was completely ignoring Jan,
And talking only to,
Linda,
Even standing at an angle,
Facing only Linda,
As if Jan,
Wasn’t even at the table.
Now Jan was by far,
And away,
The best looking of the two,
If not also,
In the bar that night,
Or most any bar,
Every night.
Jan smiled to herself,
Took a slow,
Deliberate drink,
Out of a tall glass,
Filled with,
Cîroc vodka,
Ginger ale and ice.
She has seen,
This ploy before,
Where the guy walks up,
To the table,
And blocks out,
The girl he is really after,
And just talks to her friend.
If he can keep,
The conversion going,
For a minute or more,
The target girl,
Will do one of two things.
1.     Tell him to F--k off,
That they aren’t interested.
2.     Or feeling unnoticed and rejected,
Try and get his attention.
And when he does turn,
And talk directly to her,
She feels special,
And lucky,
To be noticed by him,
Giving him a slight edge,
On her,
For the rest of the night.
Jan sat their quietly,
Watching it all play out,
Never saying a word,
Just slowly nodding her head,
No,
To Linda,
When he mentions,
Buying them drinks.
As his shadow,
Slips off her,
And Linda falls back,
Into the story,
She was telling,
Before the interruption.
Jan surveys the people,
In the bar,
She notices a guy,
At the end of the bar,
That seems out of place,
Well over dressed,
For this crowd,
Of jeans and hoodies.
She could tell,
He was drinking scotch,
And the expensive stuff too.
She had seen the bartender,
Grab the bottle,
Off a top shelf,
Where the liquid levels,
On the bottles,
Rarely moved.
As Linda’s story,
Is winding down,
To an ending,
That Jan had,
Already heard,
Two more guys,
Start to walk towards them.
They were both carrying,
PBR drafts,
So she was pretty sure,
That they weren’t,
Going to offer,
To buy them a round.
But they seemed easy going,
And just wanted,
To play doubles,
In a game of pool,
Jan was bored,
So she said yes.
It wasn’t long before,
Their politeness wore off,
And the alcohol,
Took over,
They couldn’t stop,
The crude remarks,
Every time one of the girls,
Bent over to shoot,
Or got close to them,
As they made their way,
Around the table.
When they weren’t,
Speaking obesities,
They both were,
Visually assaulting them.
Jan excused herself,
And dragged Linda,
Behind her,
To the bathroom,
For a break,
In this both,
Visual,
And verbal,
Public mauling.
Jan checked her look,
In the mirror,
And as usual,
Was quite happy,
With what she saw.
Linda had taken a pen,
And started writing,
A crude joke,
On the side of,
A bathroom stall,
But had forgotten,
The punch line,
So she left it,
Only halfway finished.
The girls were tiring,
Of this low energy,
Average at best,
Bar scene,
Going on here,
So they slipped out,
The back door.
Leaving behind,
Two unfinished drinks,
And a couple of guys,
That will wait,
20-more minutes,
To take their next shot,
Before they realize,
The girls,
Aren’t coming back.
There was a bright,
Security light,
Over the back door,
Of the bar,
That lite up,
The rear parking lot.
Leaning up against,
A wall,
Smoking cigarettes,
Half hidden,
In the shadow of the light,
Were a couple of,
“Pretty Boys”,
As Jan,
Liked to call them,
Everything about them,
Was polished,
From their hair,
To their nails,
With all the right tags,
On all the best clothes,
They weren’t over dressed,
But they were,
Expensively dressed.
Jan didn’t care much,
For “Pretty Boys”,
They were way,
To high maintenance,
For her taste,
But Linda,
Was all about the look,
And these boys had it.
Jan could see,
The hunger in Linda’s eyes,
“Why don’t you go over”,
“And ask them”,
“If they know of”,
“Any place to be tonight”.
Linda started to fidget,
At even the thought,
Of doing that.
Jan gave her a minute,
And could see,
She wasn’t going to budge,
So she pulls out,
Her phone,
And holding it,
To her chest,
Says to Linda,
Remember that thing you did,
A couple of weeks ago,
When you got drunk?
Linda snapped to attention,
And gave off a worried look,
Well if you don’t go over,
And talk to those guys,
I’m going to show them,
This,
Turning her phone,
Towards Linda,
The bright light,
Of the phone,
Shinning on Linda’s,
Shocked face,
Brought a broad smile,
To Jan’s face.
And without hesitation,
Linda marched over,
To the two guys,
And bashfully said,
“So”,
“Hey”,
“Is, anything happening tonight?”
One of the guys,
Takes a long drag,
Off his cigarette,
As he seems to ponder,
The question,
Standing in a stance,
As if he’s much to cool,
To be bothered by,
This question,
Or any kind of question,
Blows out his smoke,
In a much to,
Practiced move,
Replies,
“Well there is a new bar opening”
“At the old Red Rock location”,
“Might turn into a place to be”.
Jan walked up,
As he was finishing his sentence.
As soon as both boys,
Saw Jan,
Their postures went,
From relaxed and cool,
To forced and unnatural.
Linda noticed the change,
And it made her feel like,
She was on the winning team,
That just broke,
Their opponents spirt.
And with that added,
Boost in confidence,
She followed up with,
“So what’s this club’s name?”
“That you’re sending us to”,
“And I do hope”,
“You’re not wasting our time”.
Jan is smiling to herself,
And feeling good about,
Having a hand in,
Linda’s social growth spurt.
The first guy,
Having a little trouble,
Finding his words,
Still a little stunned,
At Jan’s sudden appearance,
His buddy jumps in,
And tries to rescue him,
“It’s so new”,
“It doesn’t have a name yet”,
And Anton,
Should be working the door,
Tell him you’re a friend,
Of Bradley,
And he’ll let you ladies,
Skip the cover charge.
“Thanks Boys”,
Says Jan,
But do you think,
I ever have to pay a cover?
As she strikes a pose,
Before them,
Inviting them to,
Take a good look,
At her body.
The 2nd boy answers back,
Lady,
I bet you don’t have to,
Pay for much of anything.
Linda,
Calls out,
“Thanks”
Over her shoulder,
As both girls,
Headed for the curb,
To catch their Uber driver,
That was just 2-minutes out.
Linda falls into another story,
As soon as both girls,
Climb into the back,
Of the Uber driver’s car.
Jan knows the ending,
To this one too,
But Linda so enjoys,
Telling her stories,
That she pretends,
To listen intently,
As she quickly scans through,
A page worth,
Of missed texts,
On her phone.
As Linda’s story,
Comes to a much,
Unanticipated ending,
Both girls fall silent,
Staring out there,
Respective windows.
The driver pulls up,
Right in front of the club,
To let the girls out,
Linda clumsily,
Got out of the car,
But Jan,
Used her patented,
Long legs stretch,
That always draws,
Attention to her.
You would see one,
Then the other,
Of her long legs,
Stretching out of the car door,
Almost as if,
They were grabbing hold,
Of the side walk,
And pulling her,
Out of the car,
And no matter if,
You were a man,
Or a woman,
You had to keep looking,
To see what was,
Attached to the,
Top of them.
As the girls,
Approached the doorman,
Linda was 10-feet ahead,
Due to her rapid exit,
Of the vehicle,
And was stopped,
By the doorman,
Jan,
Didn’t even slow down,
As she just took,
Linda by the arm,
And said,
“She’s with me”,
Purposely brushing,
The most important parts,
Of her body,
Against the doorman,
On her rush,
Into the club.
A sort of diversionary tactic,
That takes his mind,
Off the door,
Long enough for her,
To slip in.
Theirs a local band,
Playing in the back,
Of the club.
They see two guys,
At a small table,
Off to the side,
Of the room,
Jan doesn’t want to ask,
To share their table,
That’s worse than,
Accepting a free drink,
Because you’re stuck,
Sitting next to them,
And end up playing,
20-personal questions,
At the very least.
So the girls walk over,
And stand with,
Their backs to them,
Where Jan,
Standing on one heel,
And looking like,
A baby fawn in trouble,
Takes off the other heel,
Hands it to Linda,
And starts to massage,
Her foot.
And in a voice,
Just loud enough,
To be heard behind her,
She tells Linda,
“My feet are killing me”,
“I think I got these heels”,
“One size to small”,
And throws a little glance,
Of distress,
Behind her,
And that was all it took.
“Hey Girls”,
“I overheard you”,
“Please come and sit”
“Over here with us”
“I couldn’t live with myself,
Seeing those,
Pretty little feet,
In any kind of pain”,
So with that,
One act play,
The girls were sitting.
Unfortunately for the guys,
Very shortly,
They will have to,
Abandon their seats,
Do to the endless,
Parade of guys,
Stopping by the table,
Chatting up the girls,
And making them feel,
Invisible.
Linda,
Trying to be nice,
Started into,
One of her stories,
Trying to pay back,
The guy’s kindness,
With a little,
Personal attention.
Both guys listened,
As they stole looks,
Of Jan,
And glanced towards the band.
Jan,
Who was mostly ignoring,
All three of them,
Just watched the band,
And the somewhat hot,
Lead singer.
40-minutes later,
The guys were gone,
As predicted,
Standing in the back,
Of the bar.
Jan grabbed the,
First two cool looking girls,
To walk by,
And offered up the seats,
Saving them from,
A maybe worst,
Random,
Luck of the draw.
The night still had,
A long way to go,
But the girls didn’t,
The conversion,
Which had started to lag,
Was now almost,
Absent,
Expect for Linda,
Who felt the need,
To point out,
Every hot guy,
And comment on,
Whether they would be,
Right for her,
Or Jan.
The girls seemed to,
Turn and face each other,
At the same time,
Sensing that their night,
Has just died,
In front of them.
The girls make their way,
Out of the club,
Linda seems to perk up,
When she sees a,
“Pretty Boy”,
She thinks is both Hot,
And just her type,
But that quickly fades,
When no matter,
How she tries,
To get his attention,
As she walks by,
Sorley fails,
“He’s probably gay”,
She says to Jan,
Trying to make herself,
Feel a little better,
About being unnoticed.
The girls walk past,
The doorman,
Who gives Jan a smile,
Thinking she would,
Remember him,
But she doesn’t.
Once out on the street,
It’s a busy enough club,
That a couple of taxis,
Are hanging out,
Down a side street away,
Linda flags one down,
By lighting her Bic lighter,
And holding it,
Up in the air,
Like she’s at a concert,
A universal code for taxi,
She was once told,
By a drunken,
New Zealander,
She had met.
Linda,
Hollers back to Jan,
Who’s checking her look,
In the reflection,
Of a store front window,
“Cab’s here”,
“Let’s Go Princess”,
Barks Linda.
The girls climb into,
The back of the cab,
And settle into,
The well-worn seats,
Of the taxi,
Duck tape,
Having been used,
To repair some,
Large tears,
In the vinyl covering,
Of the seats.
Jan turns towards Linda,
You know Linda,
You’re very pretty,
You have that,
“Little Girl Lost”,
Look going on,
You just come across,
A little too desperate.
Linda scoffs,
And shakes her head,
This coming from,
“One of the Noticeable Ones”,
Who has that,
“Your every guys dream”,
Look going on.
Jan smiles,
She knows Linda’s right,
She has always been,
The center of attention,
When it came to men,
But that has,
Taught her a thing or two,
About men.
Linda,
I’m just trying to say,
You got a lot,
To work with.
That “Pretty Boy”,
At the last bar,
A little less effort,
And a lot more,
“I Don’t Give a F--k”,
Attitude,
And he would have been,
Stalking you.
Linda giggles,
“Little Girl Lost”,
But carrying,
A spiked bat.
Well,
Something like that Linda.
So,
Jan,
What do you say,
Next weekend,
We go to the Whisky A Go-Go,
Their having a battle,
Of the Hair Bands.
You and those “Pretty Boys” Linda.
Linda smiles,
And is reminded,
Of a funny story,
And starts reciting the story,
From the beginning,
Two sentences into it,
And Jan realizes,
She has heard it before,
But it’s a good story,
And Linda so enjoys telling it,
So Jan just sits back,
And gives Linda,
Her full attention,
As Linda,
Throws her arms,
Into the air,
To make a point,
Hitting the roof,
Of the cab,
Scaring the driver,
Causing both girls,
To bust up laughing,
Till they cry.
The street light changes,
From red,
To green,
As the cab,
Turns left,
On to,
Santa Monica Boulevard,
And as the taxi,
Merges into traffic,
Linda returns to her story,
As Jan,
Returns her thoughts,
And both girls,
Escape,
Into the night…
 
      Tom Allen…04-22-2017…