A REFLECTION OF MY SOUL

Dad you have gone,

You slipped away in your sleep!

God gave you beautiful angel wings

For you to keep!

Entering the ‘Halls of Healing’,

Where Angels play harps...

No more pain or sickness!

As the cleansing starts...

Now a Guardian Angel,

Watching from above!

Sending a single white feather,

As a symbol of your love.

Your memory is alive in all four corners of my heart!

We had an open and honest relationship right from the start!

We had some difficult conversations along the way, but I loved you more than life itself in every possible way!

I remember as a child sitting on your knee,

Whilst we watched clips of the news and you asked me who I wanted to be!

I was so proud of you - the Policeman,

So articulate and bright!

I wanted to be just like you a shining beacon of light!

You were in the Navy, the Police, an Ambulance driver to,

Serving your community was inherent in you!

You had 3 biological children & adopted 5 more,

With all of the fostering .. St Aiden’s Terrace was a revolving door!

We enjoyed many day trips in the White mini bus, to Wales, Bala, Blackpool as if that wasn’t enough! 

You took us canoeing, on donkey rides, climbing mountains in Wales.. it was always an adventure and so where your tales!

I will never forget how you said you met mum,

Dropping an egg sandwich on her lap led to years of love & fun!

Both with deep hearts to take all of us in,

Despite all of our dramas you never caved in!

When mum died the family dynamics naturally changed and the distance between us caused me a lot of pain!

You were always my inspiration held on a pedal stool so high, so when you tried to climb off it I asked myself why?

My heart was so heavy! I longed for your love! For you to miss me.. to call me.. to express your heart felt love!!

Then in December 2018, you were in intensive care! 

My heart did a million somersaults,

I was tearing out my hair!

I just needed to be with you! Anxious to make you well! That part of my life was a living hell!!

You communicated in hospital that you loved me too!

I felt euphoric that I had received this validation from you!

You held my hand whilst I cried,

Which was a beautiful twist!

You commented on how mum had a charm bracelet just like the one on my wrist!

It was a beautiful miracle that you grew stronger each day, 

You were discharged from hospital,

for Christmas Day!

So imagine the shock & devastation when on Easter Day, 

I receive a phone call from Lisa telling me you had passed away!

It doesn’t make sense that you just slipped away ...

So many conflicting emotions night & day!

However! 

The strongest emotion of all, is how much I love you!

& how much you will always be adored!

John Hartley Roberts!

... Dad! 

Before you passed away, we had become so much closer, and for that I am glad!!

Although, my heart still feels heavy!

I wish you understood that I only ever wanted the truest, deepest, most honest love!

I feel we understood each other right at the end ... we should have never wasted a single second is the message this sends!

What is love you might ask...?

Well it’s hurt and pain!

It’s missing you Dad & wishing you could come back again!!

So I like to think of you at peace now, an angelic light!

A star that watches over us, shining so bright!

Love runs deep... !!  ❤️

Forever in my heart!

Love Wendy 

Written by © Wendy Roberts 22-04-2019

(Passed - 1pm on 21/04/2019)