She was there every morning,
manning the drive-thru as I
hurried through for a large,
black coffee and a futile
attempt at a quick, "healthy"
breakfast on my way to work.
"Good Morning Ma'am." she said,
"How are you today?"
She smiled a familiar gap-toothed
smile and tried to smooth the wrinkles
from her crinkled, red, work shirt.
A cracked, black belt fought
to hold up the oversized black slacks
she was wearing. I saw in her
eyes the same frantic sadness that's
present there each and everyday.
"I'm fine, how are you?" I routinely
mumbled as I quickly glanced over
my list of things to do for the day:
Electric Bill – Check
Car Payment – Check
Daughter's College Tuition – Check
Call the vet - Check
"Well not so good today." she confided,
"My boyfriend decided this morning he
ain't gonna work no more and he
up and quit his damned job. I had to get up
and come to work anyways...somebody has to
pay the rent cuz they're fixin' to evict us."
"I'm sorry to hear that." is all
I could say. "You hang in there."
"Yep. Well you have a great
day." She beamed. "Sposed to
be beautiful I hear."
For a moment, she opened a tiny,
private window to her world and
let me peek in. But, I drove on.
Out of my side mirror I watched her
as she stood patiently inside her
glassed-in misery still trying
to smooth the wrinkles from her shirt.
She caught my eye and flashed
another bright, gap-toothed smile.
It truly was an awesome smile.
I drove away wishing I had more time--
and more courage--to listen to her,
and something a helluva lot more profound
to say than,"Hang in there."
Somehow I felt like I too had let her down that day.