He caught his bus to Barnsley
Thinking he'd be there soon
But the driver took a wrong turn
And they landed on the moon
Where the King of the Selenes
A most delightful host
Served them Lunar Honey
On hot buttered toast
And a string quartet played
Until half past three
When the Lady Queen
Served her special lemon tea
Then they all stood chatting
As the driver turned his bus around
And at the very first attempt
Got it straight off the ground
Back down in Barnsley
He couldn't for his life
Think of an excuse
To tell his waiting wife
So he told the truth
Which cost him a clout
As she whacked his head
On her angry way out
If there's a moral to this story
It's no matter how he tries
If the world don't like the truth
They'll insist a fellow's telling lies
