Heart Songs - Child Of Many Tears

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Child Of Many Tears

The Child Of Many Tears

Oh my darling Joseph
Why are you so angry with me?

I look at you and weep
For the little guy
That lit my heart
With only a thought of you

It breaks my heart to find us
To be this way

We have always had a very
Special bond you and I

I have held you closely
In my hugs since you were
Three months old

Always so happy and joyful
Lighting every heart
You met along your way

My heart aches to
See that part of you leaving

I do not want to be the one
To always have to tell you no ...

I want to be only Grandma to you
The Grandma that has brag writes
And always gets the bestest smiles

Your memories are now forming of me

I so wish that they could be
Of this three years past
Where you dropped in on poet's page
To bring your uplifting joy
In little adventures of your busy day

You made so many people so very happy

Now you have so much fun
Playing mind games with Grandma
That I hardley recognize the little boy
Who just "Dropped in"

So much of you I no longer understand

Even poor Buddy has learned
To try and stay away
He does not understand either

I worry that you will be bitten
And yet if you were
It would be deserved

Why have you declared war?

Most would say it is a phase
That you will quickly grow out of

They do not see the cloud that
Passes over your angelic face

You look directly at me and do
What you know is exactly
The opposite of what you should do

Hour after hour of constant battle
Leaves Grandma just wishing
For our time for the day
To come to its end

Our battle of 'Wills' is putting me
Where I do not want to belong
And always the question
Of what has caused the drastic change

Too many hours
Of what is not truly home
Perhaps the cause?

Mommy tries but sometimes
I think she passifies you
To take the easier road
And when you do not get
The same from me ...

You are NOT a happy camper

Or is perhaps the cause
Because your vocabulary
Is very limited

You are a carbon of your Mommy
And I know what lies ahead for you
Praying that your life will be easier

You try so hard to be understood
And time after time of the same
Words spoken and still not understood ...
God help me but my patience wears thin

Joseph
What would you tell Grandma?

If you could understand me
And I could understand you
Could you tell me what is wrong
So I can fix it?

You explode in fits of rage
When you do not get your own way
And the physical struggle to
Make you give in to the idea that
Grandma is boss begins

Again most would say
"He is just being a three year old."

Again ...
I would say to you
You do not see the cloud
That is made evident

I have seen this cloud before Joseph
Upon the face that you call Daddy
And it scares me to see it at times
Finds itself to your expressions
As well

Your way or Hell to pay
So much now our days

Pehaps you do not understand
The meaning of the word 'Bully'
And yet you make its meaning
Very clear to me

Who was once Joseph is slipping away
And it breaks my heart to see you go

I have tried everything
And it leaves my heart weary
And wondering
What the next day will bring

Will it be Good Boy Joseph I will see?

You are getting harder and harder to find
As so am I

And so the war continues
Without perhaps neither side
Understanding the true why's

The battle must soon be over
For one side tires of the war

I love you Joseph unconditionally
But please try to help Grandma
Not weep for the little boy
I now see so seldom

Grandma

November 12, 2008

Lullabye For A Stormy Night
Artist
Vienna Teng

Child Of Many Tears

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