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 Contemporary poetry by Dan Donlan

PUTTING EGO ASIDE


I wrote:It takes a man to be humble

Games were going on in all the fields
Ladies softball, kickball, Little league
The language in the field next to our's x-rated
We were playing district little league championships
When a parent said, "I think that is horrible"
I walked over stuck my head in the dugout,
"I don't appreciate the language you are using,
Our children do not need to hear your foul language."

I won't do the complete poem. It is called, "It takes a
man to be humble." I thought it took a lot for this
young man to come over and apologize. So I receive and
trust me, I welcome critique good or bad, but what does
this mean? But first let me add, the boy swearing the most
 also went back to his team and pressured
them to realize there were children in the next field.
There was nothing ego false or biblical. He showed
character in doing the right thing. I fully expected
a confrontation where it might have exacerbated the foul language

This is the critique:

Yet you did not speak the whole truth, now did you...
and half a lie is no less a whole lie! Now you tell
me of your knowledge of the good book, what ten
commandments say of baring false witness, then maybe
brother...you can see past your own ego!

What does that mean? Where did I tell of knowledge of
the good book and where is ego involved? I thought
the young man coming to apologize and use his influence
to clean up the language around children a responsible
thing to do.







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