Most of the time I try to be so brave and cover up the pain I feel, and friends and relatives think I'm remarkable. But other times, like today, the pain of losing not one, but two of my sons and the man who was the love of my life becomes unbearable. I'm supposed to spend this weekend with my two living sons and their families. My kids are wonderful, and they're always smiling and happy and I don't cry or complain to them because I feel that it upsets them (yes, this has happened once or twice and it made me feel worse than ever). So I just smile and act brave and all is okay for them and sometimes even for me. Strange thing is that I woke up this morning thinking that I had to pack my bag for the weekend -- and when I looked through it I saw that the bag was packed but with all the wrong thngs -- so I had to start all over again. I honestly don't remember packing anything originally, that's how upset I am. My son Ronnie died the day before Mother's Day this year and my heart was breaking but I acted like a trooper. Please pray for me and may God bless you my friends. Love, Annette