I Never Had A Clue

Before this time last year
I felt all was just fine true
I never knew each time I came back
To Australia what it was she would do
I never knew at all no way at all
But now its all old hat and through
I remember writing before this time
How 2009 it would be worse than blue
I wrote these very words back then
What a bad year 2009 it would be
I had no idea al all back then
It would be the worst known year to me
It took so much weight from my body and soul
And wind out of my sails ever so
An almost a breakdown was in store
As so much so soon I came to learn and know
But Im not blaming here but feeling sorry
As one I loved at that time was so ill
And I never knew oh how much its true
To a great extent I know not still
Ive spent this year in deepest thought
How come all of this could ever be
But endless trust and love go hand in glove
And real true love can be so blind you see
A year of total trauma and of heartache
And the heartache how it honestly was all mine
Well layed plans where in layed place before
I knew anything of it at all at the time
But now looking back in almost confusion
I feel so sad for those I loved then n love yet still
As it all has only brought all concerned such pain
And get over it all in life we never will
But though I am a shell of my former self
I stand yet and to try n do my very best
As I was doing back then at the time
When I was cheated of true loves final quest
But this year has been a year of learning
And Ive learned as I never thought I ever could
And survived absolute and total heartache
As any soul on earth to know never really should
But when I said 2009 would be a bad year
I never really never knew or had a single clue
Of what some souls that you totally in life adore
Can find the reasons and audacity to execute and do
But next year Im telling here and right now
Will be a better one all round for all by far
And more love true love for one another hand in glove
Will lead us all through like a guiding star
But me .. But me .. In all sincerity
Will walk a more careful track along lifes road
And simply take one precious day at a time
And carry with me a way much lighter load
Life can change within an hour ever so
How drasticly it can this is so ever true
My entire life had done this very thing within an hour
And to this day its so why I still never had a clue

Terrence Michael Sutton
copyright 2009
( Cant wait to add the date of 2010 )
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