THE NUN WHO SAVED MY LIFE

The following was written by Sister Mary Jane,
who saved this orphaned infant's life.

If she hadn't taken a keen interest in me,
I doubt I would have written any poetry.

At 8 months old, I was the baby
left on the Orphanage steps.

Holy Innocents Orphanage,
Portland, Maine
became my home until I was three.

When I was in my early 40s,
I found Sister Mary Jane again.

She came to Utah to visit me.
She brought many photos.
I saw "Baby Me" for the first time in my life.

Finally the missing puzzle pieces appeared.
With pictures, I learned that what I decided
wasn't true.

During the three years at Innocents,
many times I was dressed and interviewed
by couples seeking a child.

Also, I learned that my natural mother
and her mother, brothers, and sisters
visited me from time to time.

Too young to understand I surmised:

No one chose me, no one took me home.
I decided it must be because I was too ugly.
You know how children try to make sense
of their world, and make decisions about life
that they hold onto.  Decisions that can take
a lifetime to overcome.

What I learned is that I was "stuck in the system".
My natural mom didn't sign any papers releasing me for adoption.
It was like an adopting couple couldn't get a Clear Title,
that was why I was never chosen.

Actually, with pictures in hand, I learned that I was quite cute, and
though it took a few years, I no longer believe I am ugly.

Years later, after our reunion visit,
Sister Mary Jane sent me the following description
of my morning orphanage routine.
It seems I was the Holy Innocent home's Sisters' favorite,
Thank God!

And Sister Mary Jane's constant chatty companion.
She told me she taught me how to laugh.

I share it here so that it might have a chance
of living forever in cyber land
in case the hard copy is lost.

From The Sister Who Saved My life, Sister Mary Jane:

Do you have any questions about what you were like as a baby??

Here's a sample:

In the dining room at Holy Innocents,
the nuns would be at breakfast,
(usually in total silence because 'Berta'
(the Mother Superior) was such a wild woman
that no one wanted to get her started!

I was the youngest and the only one not afraid of her...and she knew it!)
Ha!

Anyway, upstairs the children were being bathed and fed.

Somewhere during breakfast we would hear these little baby footsteps
coming, pat-pat; pat-pat down the stairs ...
when you got on the landing, with only 3 steps more,
you would be facing us.

Standing there, this darling baby voice would pipe into the sullen silence:

"'mornin  Berta"   "'mornin may jay" --

in turn we would answer you with great  enthusiasm
and you would take that as your signal
and come quickly as you could down the last steps
and run into the dining room.

Something in you always knew that "Berta" had to be first,
so you would run up to the head of the rectangular table
and she would do hugs and kisses and
then you would go around behind her chair
and pass over the others as you streaked to me at the end of the table...

I would swoosh you up into my lap and hug you half to death.
Then you would (after marvelous giggles) hop down and patter off
into the chapel across the corridor
and down to the front of the house on the left.

There you would be very quiet, almost reverential,
and step slowly up on the altar,
step right in front of the tabernacle with the gold door,
which was not covered so you could see it.

Then we would hear the dearest little "'mornin Dod"
(which we were all listening for)
you then stepped down and went to the Mary statue
at the left of the  altar and we'd hear "Mornin Mar"
...then the long trip of pitter pats around the altar
back to the right side and up to the large statue of
Jesus and ""Mornin Taka Har"  (Sacred Heart!)

Honey, this was your morning routine every single day without fail.

You never skipped it because you were never ill.

It did something special to those tough old nuns
and the atmosphere was always lighter
after you blessed us all so sweetly.

You would then come running back to me
and climb into my lap and suck salt out
of my little salt shaker!!

I was so proud of you!!

You see,  I had care of the chapel,
really the reason I was living there,
as I had no baby duties.

I taught second grade down the hill at Sacred Heart School.
But you were always with me when I was home
and would "help" me,
which meant "wha dat ma ja"

So, I told the names of things....
but the Good morning routine was all yours,
no one taught you to do that...and no one said Berta 1st...
you just knew a lot of things instinctively.

In short, you were totally adorable!!!

Hugs and Kisses again from Ma Ja

Sister Mary Jane convinced her parents to take me into their home
when I became too old for this "baby orphanage".
Actually, I was a stow away for a year or so
because I was too old, but the nuns protected me because
I would have been shipped to the "big kid" orphanage.

Sister Mary Jane told me this would have been a dangerous place.
So, at age three I moved to the Sister Mary Jane Smith's home
to live with her parents.

Oddly, I still have many memories of this and even the Orphanage.

It's like I have a video tape of my life recorded for access.  Go figure!

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