HOT STUFF      

                 Harry and Darry were very good friends. Even though they came
              from two different worlds, they spent a lot of time together and
              enjoyed each others' company immensely, discussing women and events
              of the time.
                  Harry came from a middle-class family and Darry came from the
              poorest section of the East Side; but in spite of their differences
              they got along very well.

                   Harry's family was having a dinner and Darry was invited.  
              Darry was afraid to go but he had a rapport with his stomach which
              spoke to him.  "I am hungry all the time and you now have the
              opportunity to put food in, so you better go.  Even a car won't
              go without gas.  So you better put some food in or I will ping and
              pang you until you do."  Darry decided to go to the dinner.

                    When he arrived at the dinner he was amazed at what he saw.  
              There was a long table filled with containers of food.  A turkey sliced
              for taking, and an additional turkey standing by for slicing in case
              it ran out.  Looking at all this food, Darry decided to stuff as
              much as he could into himself so that he wouldn't be hungry so
              quickly again.  

                     Darry noticed that the first container had a little tag
              saying, "Hot Stuff."  He took that to mean that it was a popular
              dish and so he decided to take as much as he could of it.  He loaded
              a heaping tablespoon and gulped it down.

                     His eyes nearly popped out of his head and his tongue was
              hanging out of his mouth gasping for air.  Even his ears stood out
              in a horizontal position.  He began to run around the room like a
              wild animal, moaning and groaning.

                    No one knew what had gotten into him so they chased him and held on
               to him asking what happened.  He pointed to the container with the tag
               "Hot Stuff."  They asked him if he wanted some of that and he vigorously
               shook his head, "No."  He decided to himself he would never eat
               another morsel of food unless someone else tasted it first.

                      In the newspaper's Classified section an ad appeared:
               "Wanted.  Individual who likes shopping, cooking, and enjoys
                eating.  For more information please reply to 555-1234."

                      The first reply stated:  You don't want an employee.
               You want a WIFE!"


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