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Ooooer, Paging Dr. Hayes?Ooooer, Dear Dr Hayes, yep, it's me, Cath, the poet once again! You really have to admit it, (cos I do,) I'm really such a pain! I think I drive you up the pole, and maybe do your head in too! Well let's face it; honestly, I know I'm good at what I do! I'm unique, and it's just as well! Cos two of me would drive you insane! I mean, can you honestly see it? You'd go sicker if you saw 2 of my name! But no fear, no worries doc, cos there's really only one of me! I bet that you are feeling relived! And I don't blame you; you see! And you know, my back is knackered and my ribs are such a mess! But to look at me, you'd never tell, well, I don't think that you'd guess?! Then again, I'm a bit bent and twisted; and all lop-sided to my right! Yes sireeee, I have to concede, I think I must look an awful sight! Now when we came to see you once, you were wearing shorts! I think you got mixed up with work, and thought you were at sports? I have to say, they were ok, but flipping heck, your legs are bad! All short and bent, and hairy too, yep, John lad, you're just sad!! So there you were just sitting there, in your poshest chair, Thinking you were great I bet, as you held your nose in the air! But hey, now why is that? What on earth was it you could smell? Flipping heck, it was your feet, cos you had your pumps on as well! Well, so ok, they were trainer shoes, so shoot me for that too! I think you should lend mine; I've had them for years longer than you! Cos you know, mine don't smell at all, well, I don't think they do? Nah, of course they don't, cos mine forever stay brand new!! So anyway, where was I? Oh, yeah, your job, and the pain you cause! As you stick them needles in us, I can see you grin - as you pause!! Then jab them into my poor sore ribs! And hurt me once again! Dr. Hayes, I mean it lad!! ‘You' are the one that's a pain! Well, ok, maybe I give you a hard time? But you do my head in too! Honestly, what can I say? Well, errrm...I think I better not do! Cos you may just want to plant me, and I'm already bent and knackered! So please refrain from torture! Cos I'm sitting here cream-crackered! You see, it only takes me about 2 minutes, to do a poem or three, But my back is sore, my knees are shot, and me neck is killing me! So now my poems mostly stay in my head, cos it hurts to type them out! Cos did I forget to tell you? This arther-itis is in my fingers; running all about! So anyway, John, let's not detract, cos this is ‘your' poem written here! Of course, I had to amend it a tad, cos you deserve it, and I don't care! I saw you grinning in clinic last week, yeah; I've eyes in the back of my head! So you just better watch it pal, or you just may end up in pain instead! I know you're always up the wall, yes, honestly, I can really tell! It must be those awkward patients who are giving you sheer hell? You see, it truly shows in your wrinkles and in your grey hair too! Let's face it kid, you can't hide it, so there's nothing you can do! But I'm not in that category, nope, cos I'm in a category of my own! Good job that poor Rich is quiet and calm, as he lords it in our home! Unlike you who chase's me out, every time I see you in clinic, Dear me lad, what's your problem? You really are becoming a cynic! (Well, it rhymed!) He's a star really, but...shhhhh, don't tell!!! Poetry Ad-Free Upgrades Vote for this poem
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