We started out as mates
only the magic was always there
to challenge we would bate
but always with a mind for care
Then one day pleasing
over drinks we spoke
you with your usual teasing
daring me to go for broke
The magic positively flickered
the vibes between us a live wire
in jest we also bickered
whilst the ante we upped higher
Finally came the infamous dare
who would call chicken first
as the gauntlet you laid bare
the tension grew to near burst
Suddenly it was no longer a game
surely this couldn't be happening to me
I was terrified things would never be the same
only now the dare was all I could see
Every day my mind would change
one day yes, then a quick turn no
God I felt so alive, so strange
one moment high, the next second low
How could I even think
about crossing such boundaries
to what level would I sink
what price will be the piper's fees
Then the day of reckoning arrived
and suddenly I was in control no more
God help you, you fool I sighed
as I left and closed my front door
Our time together was pure magic
reality surpassed all hopes
as the seconds away slowly ticked
intimate words to me you spoke
Through all the suffusion
part of my soul I laid bare
I trusted in you, an illusion?
as with you myself I shared
I gave you my heart
I gave you my soul
even as I knew we must part
I expressed how you I behold
We've been together since then
but after you let me in
your vulnerability my friend
has left my head in a spin
I've made no demands
it's all been on your terms
perhaps that's where the problem stands
as the tide of interest turns
Now you shut me out
and pretend everything never was
at your indifference I shout
it hurts like nothing else does
You won't speak or communicate
your thoughts or words or fear
now that your hunger is slate
it is me who holds you dear
Was it game to save face
a challenge of your skill
the thrill of the chase
the satisfaction of the kill?
I hate myself, you know
the way your indifference erodes my self-worth
I tell myself to let go
it's not the end of the earth
Only I can't help but remember
the magical times we had
our friendship from September
time when before I was sad
Words whispered close
when you were spent
so glad you chose me
I wondered what they meant
Forget the evening by the fire
or bodies alight with passion
forget the looks filled with desire
is it now all gone and done?
From the start, for fun was all
only like the dare, it began to grow
your hands and lips I still recall
where few for fun, I ever let go
Why oh why have you killed it?
when it was so very sweet
I thought I made you feel a bit
like I swept you off your feet
I know you have other
commitments in your life
I am not the type to smother
or go where I cause strife
Has guilt of sudden reared its head
or have you nothing left to feel
am I to you so easily dead
or have you other conflicts which to deal?
It is because there were moments
where you left behind your armour
that I feel the sudden difference
in the us of before and after
Who were you then?
the real you who ran away
your face is full of reflection
each week a different play
Or is it a matter of beating one to it
thereby being the first to reject
lest someone see through the bullsh*t
and find a man they never before met
Was it all an act, a pack of lies?
this I doubt and would a wager spot
I remember the passion in your eyes
when you gave it all, the whole damn lot
What feels the worst and hurts the most
is that you used to be my buddy, my friend
now you look through me as though a ghost
and no more e-mails or funny cards send
You once said my problem was you
ho ho, do not believe my friend
that you will not one day too
have a broken heart to mend
Tell me what's going through your mind
I want to understand, I so need to know
even saying that, I wish I could bind
and away these rebel thoughts throw
You are concerned about 'us'
by what people might think
when all along your behaviour
never caused a blink
How would you feel
if without explanation
I severed the wheel
of our destination?
Though hard to face, the simple truth is
we got more than we bargained for
so take out the high, the need, the fizz
lest you ache and find you want more
My problem, though you never thought to ask
is that I trust in so very few
so now I must secure a masque
lest anyone guess and see me through
What rights have I?
none save this
not to be left wondering why
the face I see is one of indifference
If you want to build a fence
then I'll not stand in your way
but let me not guess at your silence
else it might not be as you would say
Left open to interpretation
silence is a destructive thing
like love it needs revelation
else unwanted results it may bring
My logic says, let him jump in a lake
just write him off, cool the heat
it's not worth the time or headache
doesn't he know it's a two way street
If it has become a game to play
but for one word, fear not I will
just show the balls and say so today
that curiosity has now satisfied the bill
Each day the pain becomes less
while memories hold strong
yet I hold out no hope but stress
that I am once again on my own
The lesson I've learned, if only a bit
is painfully simple but true
you warned me you treat woman like sh*t
little did I know you'd include me too
The truth is, simple though cruel
I trusted and let you under my skin
doing so, played the consumate fool
in being so stupid as to let you in
Dance with fire and duly get burned
Be the fool who in the end gets spurned