Alwaysawarrior

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A COMING HOME SOLDIER

A Loving Tribute to Jimmy F. Williams (USAF Ret.)
By Kathy Hadley 9-17-05


In the springtime, you held me in your arms beneath the apple blooms
I was warm and secure in your arms
Innocent and young touched by your love
I was so frightened by your leaving
Shaken and scared they were taking you away
You went away a soldier far away fighting to save your men
I waited for my soldier to return and make me his wife
You were a soldier a wounded soldier your blood stained my picture
I was your tea lock you had to forget
Your war raged on your men to protect
The war tuned you cold once a young sensitive boy
You were a young boy God saved from that hellish place
But, you returned an old soldier all broken and worn
Had to forget the girl you had asked to wait so you could make her your wife
Returned all broken dangerous and….
scared that you were someone I did not need in my life
Tried to find you they said you were dead
My world fell apart
So I took my far away soldier and put you deep in the harbor of my heart
I had to forget my far away soldier
I met another and so did you who won our hearts
Time marched on and we lived on, you found me again I know not why
You say it was because I was just someone you once knew
Had you forgotten you asked me to wait
And we would marry when you returned to the states
You were a soldier a coming home soldier all broken and worn old before your time
Home from that hellish place you returned but not to me
We cared for each other separated by time and space
10 miles down a country road or 10,000 miles away in that hellish place
Our love was erased by that hellish place
Dreams filed with no soul
Now all we have are our memories
Memories erased of the plans we had made
All we could do is forget
Now we are in the autumn of our lives both in a better place
Safe and secure in the arms of the one God chose for each other
No longer scared and innocent you found me but now not so sure of my faith
It was in the springtime that you left an innocent girl trusting in your love
You found again a woman in the autumn of her life
Warm and sheltered with a good life created with another with deep abiding faith and love
But now not so sure why vows once taken now in doubt
How can so much time go by and still hold such deep feeling for
someone so far away both in time and space
You are now an old soldier in the autumn of your life safe and secure
There is a hole in my heart that will always be there in the shape of my far away soldier
A sensitive boy far from home turned old before his time
I am so glad God spared you from that hellish place in the springtime of your life
Now in the autumn of your life you are whole and secure in your western mountains
Help the one you left behind to understand
Her war still rages on cannot forget the far away soldier
So happy he came home
Safe and secure in a better place
I asked for forgiveness you said not to worry you would answer
The world is turning upside down
Need our friendship to begin again as ones who once shared an innocent bond
Can we ever meet again share the joys of life and go on into the winter of our lives
No longer a soldier or an innocent girl but old friends found once again in a better place.



"Post script written 3-30-06 The Old Soldier is Called Home"

I had to SCREAM and CRY WHY not again
You are now gone, taken in the autumn of your life
I am left once again to go into the winter of my life without you
Sleep silently in your western mountains
You tried to answer, you tried to be kind, you tried not to hurt me
Time ran out you were called home….Home to the Father
You gave me happiness and brightness a flicker of hope
In the autumn of my life long journey you restored my
faith, hope, dreams in a world so cruel
I have cried and I screamed………….  
NOT AGAIN!!!         NOT  AGAIN!!!        WHY GOD???        WHY!!!!
But I must survive … remain human
A brief reconnection
Outcries in our hearts never let them deafen you to the rhythms of the universe
Take time to listen for the far away call of the geese
If one must shout complaints to the heaven
Remember heaven and the world can wait
Take time to be yourself
Tell the ones you touch that you care
Share joys and sorrows
Never received that finial communication, if I had it might have gone something like this
"Keep your chin up kiddo, let the sunshine in, live one day at a time never looking back but always forward with hope and faith and then with kindness and sensitivity he would add I never wanted to hurt you and I will see you again someday."
(and you would sign it) Your Bud, Jim.
You did not want to hurt me
I tried to find you once before..nothing but stone walls…silence from you,
History repeats itself 40 years later almost to the day that I met you I have to say good bye…let you go again GOOD-BYE rest in the arms of the angels
Safe and secure on your Western Mountain
When you truly love somebody you forget their failings and mistakes
You forgive and accept their love then go on
ever secure that you will meet again on the other side.



I have posted this beautiful poem on my site for a friend of mine Kathy Hadley,
Jim was stationed at the same air base as I was in Vietnam, only he had served
there and rotated back home before I ever got there.  This very heartfelt poem
about Jim touched me deeply, and I told her I would be more than happy to post
it here on my site in Jim's memory and so his former buddies who'd served with
him as US Air Force Security Policemen at Binh-Thuy AB would be able to see her
tribute to him and would know what became of him after leaving Vietnam.  
Terry Sasek - Alwaysawarrior










































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A COMING HOME SOLDIER