I'm sitting here thinking about all that you've said
and I ask myself, "Do he really love me? I often wonder if
he's just using me to avoid loneliness,or do he feels in his heart
that he just can't live without me. How I wish for once he would desire
me as much as he desire his pornography. Why do I feel that I automatically
turn you off with my very present. I know I have my faults, but do I really
deserve to be treated like this. Do I deserve to sit on the back burner
of your mind, with no consideration for my feelings. I ask these questions often of him
yet I'm not satisfied with the answers he give,your lies are just not convincing.
Our marriage is sinking, yet you refuse to pitch in and help pull us out of the sinking hole.
You say that you love me, but our past history is stopping you from falling in love with me.
I sense that you're still hurt and angry from what took place so many years ago.
If I can find it in my heart to forgive you for all the wrong you've done to me,
why can't you let this go and forgive me? You've chosen to hold on to this pain
and torture me, by forcing me to live life in a loveless marriage, feeling unwanted,
unloved, unappreciated, but yet I'm still doing all I can to get you to love me completely,
baby don't you miss me......like I...... miss you