The following is the final encore of my final one-man performance
Coerced by absolute stillness
Another inquisition of myself
That damn unrewarding manuscript
I plead insanity to the pages right before the verdict of daybreak
Writing silver lining lyrics
With the boldest ambition
My theories on life go unchallenged
Within these four white walls
This bachelor pad research lab
Customized for sporadic breakdowns of the soul
What is Existentialism?
It's the most worthless excuse for recklessness
The most important conviction we have for living freely
The scapegoat for irresponsible dreamers
And the revolution overthrowing evil dictators
My imagination cultivates seedlings of positive perception
Mediocrity subsides
But the pauper still looks gaunt and frazzled
At home in the mirror
It's a constant reminder
The microscope magnifies
After late night debauchery
Self-examinations with malignant results
Who's this man leering back at me with misguided purposes?
This cowardly man putting up his feeble defenses
That'll never revoke the mistakes littering his life's rap sheet
Twisting, turning, contorting, flexing
Showing the best angles for advertisement
Vanity is so disgraceful at home in the mirror
Materialism, narcissism
Crude self-promoters
I am not a lemming
I am the minority
The madness against the masses
Jaded eyes and deaf ears
The prejudicial pomposity of society
Their opinionated aristocracy
Prominent socialites are predominate
And I'm just a maladjusted misfit
Nursing procrastination in the afternoon
While delaying heartaches in the evening
Distressed beautiful girls
Are gatekeepers of contentment
I've got scores to settle
Starting with those reflections infesting my affirmations
The man scrutinizing me is my estranged best friend, my most intimate enemy
He echoes my condolences for the emotionally departed
But disagrees with my definition of happiness
I see great sadness in his youthful eyes
When did getting drunk and gaining the acceptance of strangers become important?
What about accomplishing the goals I've set for myself?
Years of wasted opportunities have passed me by without a good job or a good woman
So I'm left soliciting refunds for every broken promise and every kick out the front door
My cup spillith over but the deluge remains my confusion
About the divine plan we're unauthorized to speculate about
Are we that ignorant to believe that as individuals our self-importance is greater or less than anyone else's?
Isn't it possible that we're just insignificant reprocessed drones
Placed on a spiritual conveyer belt headed straight for a silent oblivion
The harsh reality for a life we gullibly assumed was sanctified
Life and Death
God and Jesus
Heaven and Hell
Factual evidence or fabrications?
We know nothing of these mysteries
Will we ever?
This pseudo-extrovert and alert devil's advocate doesn't trust anyone anymore
How could he if he doesn't even trust himself?
Not until he lends his heart to another willing specimen will he again sleep soundly
With two fingers crossed behind his back
Caressed by the smooth hands of perseverance
Then and only then will the reflections he once considered hopelessly lost
Flourish in the splendor of sweet vindication