once upon a time


Went out for a walk the other day.
No place in particular.
There I was walking down the road,
Minding my own business.
Just taking the morning air.

Now there was another person taking the air,
He'd a reluctant mutt on a lead.
Now this was a nice morning.
Plenty of fresh air, and a lovely smell wafting from the fields.
Guess what happened next. I couldn't nay believe it myself.
Didn't the dirty owner let the dog empty itself out.
Right there on the pavement!

That fresh smell I was mentioning earlier,
Well it disappeared, unlike the jobbie left behind.
The owner and the auld mutt, sure they just walked away.
Hey you! Wasn't me shouting, some other stout sort of fellow.
Your dog fouled the pavement he said.
Handing the dirty owner a piece of paper.

I thought it was to wipe the auld dog's arse.
Instead it was a fifty pound fine.
Now if there is a moral to find in this tale,
It's to clean your dog's arse when it empties itself.
It's cheaper buying dog bog roll than to fork out fifty quid.

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