We are often cruel to each other
On this Earth
People cheat
They lie
They try to win poetry contests
By voting for themselves perhaps
And that is okay
It gets your art out there
For others to decide
To read or not.

However, if we never win the contests
Who cares
It is nice to win
But I don't
With over 1300 poems here I don't win anyway.

What is winning to me
Is to have my poems in one place
Where I can go
And not write on scraps of paper
Not be afraid that typing is not
Composing a poem
That my professional help
Is paid for today
As I figured out how
To fix my paypal account
To be a poetry sponsor again
Without advertisements
Promoting your poetry
Because I am not here to make friends
That's for Facebook
I am here to understand
The thing inside me
That writes verse
In my mind
Often forgetting the poems
Because they came and went
Before I got them down as words
On paper
Or on a screen.

The winning is the numbers to me
The amount of poetry I write
The amount of traffic I bring to my site here
And I am a winner because over 300,000 reads
Proves that to me
The little me of the this
In this room
Behind this computer
Where I think of how cruel
I have been too
When i used to worry about
Who won the contest
Who was cheating
Even the best poets want to win
So if they do something not kosher
It's their sin
And I shouldn't bring it up
As I once did to Chris
That I was pissed
Because now
He is gone
And he was a poet
That turned me on
With instilling a fight in me
That poetry is something
I do not know how to write
That fight
Pushes you to do more
Than bring your stupid nursery rhyming poems
To the door
Of one already famous
And expect praise
You have to praise yourself
In this thing called poetry.

We are often cruel
When we are
Poets leave
We may not like the things they do
Or the thoughts they think
But we lose some of our best poets
Fighting for the right to write
And we already have that
If it's in our brains
Where no one can take that away
Until the gray matter in our heads
Dies some other day
But not today.

3/15/2012 1606 cj

This is for the poets I miss here
They are no longer here
Or have forgotten their works
That were done here:

Deanna Fae Prall (Dead Inside)
Chris G. Vaillancourt (Sanctus) (Triangular Duck)
Daniel Roxburgh (The Fire Inside)
I miss your work.  Please come back here.

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