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 A New Woman

Now i know why its a crush


Written at 16 years old

I hate it
I see you walking down the hall
Why didn't i lower my gaze
I look again oh heaven help my sinning
I gaze upon the beauty of those chocolaty brown eyes
The luscious ebony shaven hair
That smile oh when i see that face i try a thousand ways not to drool
I try a million ways not to look again
I see you walking down the street Oh check you out
The NY cap, the G-Star raw and Tommy H then i see the big n trainers
Colours complementing your every move
That chocolaty beauty like I'm living a bathtub of chocolate
Don't care that your not tall you're average height, dark and handsome
Tall only sounds better in a sentence coz when i see you my heart melts like chocolate
Yet you don't feel the same
I HATE IT
I HATE CRUSHING ON YOU
I know why its a crush coz i am the only one who sees this happening
Who feels all this agony
Oh yeah its only Me
You don't even look at me
You don't even notice me
I say hello you don't even say hello to me
I smile and you do not even smile back
I run into my room and tears falling from my eyes
A size 24 aint gonna compete against the look
I feel so insecure and i know looks don't mean everything, but you won't even give me a chance to show you what i can do
Who i can be and who you'll be with me
How life would be with me
You must be some kind of superstar
Girls chasing, cameras flashing, all eyes on you and you only eye up the paparazzi  
I chased you by msn and mailing didn't help
I guess  spammed one too many
I text you when i got your number from a friend
You never replied and i was too shy to call, but you never answered anyways
I rang your home and your mom was really sweet and you were ice skating
How i love to see you speed around maniacally
you're so pretty that it hurt me that you'd never like me
I never stood a chance with a guy like you so this was goodbye
I can't stand that i cry every night for you
It hurt to know I'm just ugly in your eyes like every other guy had said to me
Now i know why a crush is called a crush
I feel crushed knowing it will never be me you put your arm tightly around
It will never be me you clink your glass with
I won't ever hold your hand or kiss you
It will never be me you cuddle or snuggle up to
Now i know why its a crush







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