People always talk about deadbeat dads, but what about the not so perfect moms. I was born a child of a wonderful father who has always been there and unfortunately he passed away five years ago. My mother on the other hand, is not even worthy enough to be called mother.
My mother left my father and me when I was about 5 years old. But to be truthfully honest she’s never been there. From the day I was born she didn’t want me. She fought constantly with my father and me. Finally, my dad had enough of her hitting me and I was put with my 2nd grade teacher Mrs. Nunnly. She was a wonderful lady with a wonderful family who accepted me as one of her own. While living with her, my mother and father were getting their divorce. They both had their days to come and get me. But the only one who ever showed was my daddy. He never broke his promise to come and see me, NEVER! I would sit there by that cold window and wait to see if she would ever show. I couldn’t beg my mother to come see me. She never did either.
After a few months living with my teacher I moved back with my dad; just my dad and me. Of course my mom always said, “I am coming to see you today.” I would sit on the front porch for hours and she wouldn’t come. My dad would have to pry me off the porch and tell me she wasn’t coming. Later when I got older he said that was one of the hardest things to do is see my sullen face and be the one to tell me she wasn’t coming today. There would be times my dad wouldn’t even tell me my mother called so I wouldn’t get my hopes up and if she did come it just would be a surprise. But like always she never came.
In 1998 my father did pass away, I stayed with my aunt, my dad’s sister, who we were very close too, and her husband and two sons. My mom came over and asked me if I was going to live with her, but looking in her eyes were like looking in a stranger’s eyes; I didn’t even know this lady. As hard as it was to tell her no, I knew I was doing the right thing. I didn’t understand why this was so hard knowing she never wanted me before. So of course, I had to go to court to fight against my mom so I didn’t have to live with her. The first set of guardianship papers sent to her, she ripped up. But as soon as my aunt said I don’t want your child support money she signed them with ease. Maybe a few times did she ever call or come over.
Just recently I really got to know my grandmother, my mom’s mom. She is awesome. My mom does the same things to me as her mom. She has an excuse for everything in this world. My grandmother said she didn’t bring her up to be like that. I told her it doesn’t matter how you are brought up it’s your own decision. You are who you want to be. No one makes you be the person you are, you chose to be that person. My mother chooses to be unappreciative and cold-hearted, we don’t make her that way. I really wish she would see the two most important people that could be in her life but she rather spend her time on a loser boyfriend that will be out of her life as fast as he entered it.
I do feel real bad for her though. She is missing her daughter grow up and be a beautiful woman. What could be so important that she would miss that? I guess everything is more important to her. It’s ok though, I have everything I need and could ever want. I have a wonderful and caring mother!! She is my aunt by blood, mother by heart! I do forgive her for never being there, but only for one reason, I learned a valuable lesson!