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"Gee Whiz! Santa Sucks!"
"Mommy says that Santa won't be visiting this year.
She says it is because I have been bad.
She always seems so angry and upset 'bout everything.
She always says, 'I'm going to tell your dad.'
"Just because I broke my sister's iPad yesterday:
I only wished to see if it could float.
And then I blew it once again when we all horsed around
And I spilled grape juice on her favorite coat.
"Last week I broke Mommy's Royal Copenhagen plates.
She said to me, 'That really takes the cake!'
But I don't understand because she didn't even use them.
It's stupid to collect things that can break!
"A month ago my daddy bought a brand new fancy car--
The old one, he said, was 'obsolete.'
Boy he really blew his stack one day when he found
My chocolate candy melting on the seat.
"My brother had a new flat-screen TV in his room.
He proudly called it 'state of the art.'
I kind of knocked it over, though, while playing with my friend.
Yeah, I know: I wasn't being smart.
"If Santa has been watching me my chances will be slim
Of getting that expensive baseball glove.
But if you ask me, I think that it really sucks that Santa
Does NOT believe in unconditional love!
"I'm the victim here, you see. That is what I am.
I try to my best year after year.
If Santa wants to play that way I hope he gets my message:
Tell him he can stick it in his ear!
Yep!
Tell him he can stick it in his ear."
(12-22-14)
She says it is because I have been bad.
She always seems so angry and upset 'bout everything.
She always says, 'I'm going to tell your dad.'
"Just because I broke my sister's iPad yesterday:
I only wished to see if it could float.
And then I blew it once again when we all horsed around
And I spilled grape juice on her favorite coat.
"Last week I broke Mommy's Royal Copenhagen plates.
She said to me, 'That really takes the cake!'
But I don't understand because she didn't even use them.
It's stupid to collect things that can break!
"A month ago my daddy bought a brand new fancy car--
The old one, he said, was 'obsolete.'
Boy he really blew his stack one day when he found
My chocolate candy melting on the seat.
"My brother had a new flat-screen TV in his room.
He proudly called it 'state of the art.'
I kind of knocked it over, though, while playing with my friend.
Yeah, I know: I wasn't being smart.
"If Santa has been watching me my chances will be slim
Of getting that expensive baseball glove.
But if you ask me, I think that it really sucks that Santa
Does NOT believe in unconditional love!
"I'm the victim here, you see. That is what I am.
I try to my best year after year.
If Santa wants to play that way I hope he gets my message:
Tell him he can stick it in his ear!
Yep!
Tell him he can stick it in his ear."
(12-22-14)
