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TEN YEARS LATER What is depression Depression is a dark dismal abyss Where some of us go helplessly I have no say about going to this home for the Insane I have a desease that robs my brain of all the chemicals that my body needs to function So I take fourteen (14) different prescription drugs to keep my brain from shutting down. The medicine shuts down all my strong feelings I have no emotions, my one wish is to be able to cry I questioned my phycisan if I could stop the one drug And she ask me I which I preferred, My choice's were to set and cry all day or to have no emotions at all, And that was hard decision for me to make. I don't want to do either. But there are only two choiches. I never smile, I never laugh I don't talk . The only way I can comunicate is with my computer But I have no one to talk to . My best friends have all broken my heart My family hate to see me suffer So they stay away I understand just how they feel, stay away from the sick also. I have just been told that my deasease Is going to make me have dementia I knew there was that possibility But to know for sure scares me to death If I am lucky I will go to a skilled nursing facitity soon. Depression is a horrible thing I only see the bad There is no good for me in my life I just want to laugh I would like to feel happy I wish all these troubles would just disappear Depression stole my soul, and my feelings of contentment Do you want to read about my decline into madness I am thinking about writing about it And letting the the readers read about my journey I have not been writting these last few years The two massive strokes I had in 2007, made my speech much simpler I will always tell you the facts and the feelings that come out of my journey. I like to think about putting my feelings out there I think it Will lessen my fear to a point where I won't be afraid to live by myself. If you have an extra Prayer in your pocket think of me. Karen Jean Keicher www.ortn7533@yahoo.com Vote for this poem
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