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A ROAD-MAP TO MENTAL HEALTH By Richard Deutsch I awoke one morning with a minor itch Accompanied by an annoying twitch Between the two I got little rest So I chose SIGMUND FREUD as I wanted to be treated By the very best Thirty days on his couch (leather cold as ice) He finally drew his own conclusions That I didn’t feel were very nice “Your Id is damaged your Ego a mess Your persona is in need of an immediate nurse” All I know after thirty days Both itch and twitch each got worse. SKINNER I thought would straighten me out I heard in his field he carried much clout So he put me in his confining crate Hoping my inhibitions would dissipate There I was for six long days Six long days in SKINNER’S Box Both itch and twitch returned with a vengeance I felt like a bagel without the lox. Now MESMER was the man to cure my woes He’d cure my maladies from my head to my toes Of course he couldn’t treat me face to face I’d have to be put in a Morpheus place But his Sandman tactics fell terribly short Let me give you a quick report Since his treatment I can’t be employed There’s not a single job that I’ve kept No matter how I try to report on time I find that I’ve overslept. WHITE is a man with a different approach So I thought I’d give him a call He accepted the challenge with a robust response And told me to mirror my wall Well the fasteners didn’t fasten And the holders didn’t hold The mirror came down with a crash The visual aid so vital to my therapy Ended up in the daily trash I thought that his treatment would bring a cure But it was a theory that ran amuck I’m left with my itch and continuous twitch. Plus I now have seven years bad luck. Those doctors have taught me a lesson for sure A lesson I feel that is great And so if you want to have good mental health I urge you to self-medicate I’ll take just a moment to give some advice Before my saga ends The itch and the twitch are both tolerable If you surround yourself with good friends. March 31, 2015 Back to conquer all my fears Is this angel I've known for many long years Yes, he knew my love and he knew my pain I never thought I would smile again But my special angel this is true The sun shines again because of you. Annette |
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