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Almost 59
Guess I'm doing fine
Get a new right
Shoulder in 2 days
Thank God for Obama Care
That saves
This nurse of many years
This woman of some tears
Because growing old is difficult
Happens to us all
As no one's fault
I have fresh air
To write in
I have a place
To say goodnight in
My birds are safe
My dogs
The cat
My kids are safe
'Though some are brats
Still write this poetry
From mind to hand
Still look for a father figure
To understand
The life I've lead
Rolls in my head
The hateful words
Learning to stop
That leave me to drop
Into the cistern
To learn the unlearn
The things he said
Before I'm dead
That play inside
Where I try to hide
The grief they bring
So I can't sing
As the freedom hippie I was once
I think I'm never good enough
It makes it rough
In this 59 year old play
That hasn't seem to go away
Year after year
I'm still here
Once mating
Not hating
Any of this world
Insides unfurled
Onto paper white
To write the right
'Til all the worlds coexist
Or I get pissed
Up here in this brain
While trying to feign
It's not so bad
In this kind of year
I've had
Old body
Young brain
Still scribbling the words
To my mind's eye
Back to crying
By and by
Oh those emotions
Oceans and oceans
Of them waving
Still are saving
Me from myself
In this age
Of golden wealth
Called experience through living
That's what these words are giving
To this woman
Who keeps coming
Up with these brain games
I play day by day
Wishing to hit someone's ear
With what I fear
That's leaving me anxious
For no reason
In this unreasonable season
Where I continue to breathe
As God ain't ready
To let me leave
To have the spirit
Although he hears it
When I plead needlessly
For him to take me
He needs the astral mothers
He needs the ladies in waiting
He needs the passionate lovers
He needs me not be hating
All he gives
All I've lived
To see and hear and smell
And touch and taste his
Feel his face
Radiating pure love
Warm white above
In my mind
It is a blessing
I am guessing
As I take that in
Have faith in him
That gets through more
Opens a door
That science cannot understand
God's plan
It lives in souls who believe
Believers ain't going to leave
This Earth until the last
Of hate has shot us down
Another year will come around
I'll be here writing words
For you (and me)
It's what I love to do
So smile and sing a song
After this birthday
Spring comes on
The flowers bloom
There's natures resurrection
The suns protection
Vast sky abounding
Green surrounding
All that was dead
Comes to life instead
Of growing old
The constant move of seasons unfolds
Hope comes
Pain numbs
I go on
To write many more
heartune's songs.

3/8/2015 1500 PST cj

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