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“Twisting the Facts of Love”

He tried everything,
He could think of,
To get her attention,
But nothing seemed to work.
He didn't really have,
Much of a,
Fighting chance here,
And he knew this.
He would fail,
Over and over,
With any attempt,
He could think to try.
And many times,
Over the course,
Of a weekend,
He would have moments,
Of total lucidity,
Where he could convince himself,
He could get over her.
But the very next time,
He saw her,
Even if it was,
Just a quick glimpse,
Or he heard,
Even the faintest,
Whisper of her voice,
He knew that,
He had to keep trying.
He looked to anything,
That might give him hope,
An edge,
In this tireless pursuit,
To what he saw as,
The perfection of beauty,
Wrapped up in jeans,
And sneakers.
He once watched,
U-Tube videos,
For 5-straight hours,
On “How to tell,
If a girl likes you”.
He took out a piece of paper,
And with a black pen,
He would write down,
Any signs he thought,
She might have given him.
Each video had,
From 5 to 10 signs,
And he started out,
Only writing them down,
If he really believed,
They were true signs.
Some were very easy,
Or at least in his mind,
They were,
To put in the “Likes you column.
For example,
“Does she look you in the eyes,
When she's speaking to you?”
That was a most definite yes,
Though he didn't take into account,
The fact that she was,
A very confident,
And strong woman,
Who looked everyone,
In the eyes,
When she spoke.
“Does she find a reason,
To touch you?”
Another one,
In the win column.
He can think of 5-times,
She has touched him.
Glossing over the fact,
That 3-of the times,
Were accidental,
And the other 2,
Were over the course,
Of 3-years.
“Does she ask you,
Personal questions?”
He had to think about,
That one for a while,
Before checking,
The yes box.
In till he finally remembered,
She had asked him,
If he had a good weekend,
That's personal right?
Though it had only happened,
A handful of times,
And always after,
He had asked her,
The same question first.
This went on and on,
As he poured through the list,
And as time dragged on,
He began looking for,
Even the faintest,
Most remote reason,
To be able to,
Add it too,
The “She likes me” column.
Of course there were,
Just as many,
“How to tell,
If a girl doesn't like you” videos.
But he felt,
Those signs could,
Easily be misinterpreted,
So he decided against,
Investing any of his time,
Watching even just one,
Of those types of videos.
There was another time,
He saw her texting,
Her face,
Giving her phone,
All kinds of cheerful,
And enjoyable looks.
So he asked her,
Why don't you,
Ever send me,
A funny text?
She didn't even look up,
From her phone,
When she answered,
“You don't have a cell phone, silly”,
Or I would.
He took this,
As an open invitation,
But had he really been,
Paying attention,
To all those video's,
He had watched,
He would have noticed.
She made no attempt,
To even look towards him,
During her reply,
So much for,
Looking him in the eye.
Everybody knew he,
Didn't own a cell phone,
He wore that fact,
Like a badge of cool,
Instead of just,
What it really meant,
That he was,
Light years behind,
The rest of the world.
So knowing that,
She felt safe,
In her answer,
Not knowing that,
To him,
She just made,
A verbal contract,
To text him,
If he ever got a cell phone.
So that next day,
At work,
He made sure to sit,
As close to her as possible,
During the crews lunch hour.
He was making,
A big production,
Out of pushing buttons,
And anything he could think of,
To get her to,
Notice his new phone.
But half way through lunch,
She had only looked towards him,
And that was to say,
To another guy,
That was standing behind him.
He was dying,
With every minute that passed,
And her,
Failing to notice his phone.
Nothing was happening,
As he had envisioned it,
Playing out.
He finally just blurted,
“I got a new phone”,
“So if you ever want to text me”
She looked up,
Only due to,
His shrill voice,
Not even realizing,
It was aimed at her.
Not even paying attention,
To his words,
She just smiled,
And nodded,
And slipped back,
To her own little world.
And still no texts,
From her,
Or anyone else for that matter.
When he talked to her in person,
He would hold his phone,
Almost like a microphone,
Just so she would see it.
And whenever,
He saw her in the building,
He'd wave to her,
Holding the phone,
In his hand.
He called AT&T,
“The texting thing”,
“On my phone”,
“Is broken”.
Well sir,
We'll look into that,
For you,
Thank you for choosing AT&T.
The next day,
He passed her in the hall,
A few minutes later,
A text.
He couldn't wait to open it,
But he didn't want to be bothered,
When he read it,
So he ran to the bathroom,
Commandeered a stall,
Locked the door,
And got ready to enjoy,
His first of many texts,
From her,
And it read as follows,
“Dear Sir,
Your texting thing,
As you so eloquently put it,
Is working fine,
We would like to,
Take this opportunity,
To remind you,
Your monthly payments,
Which you have 23-remaining,
Are due by the 5th,
Of every month.
Thank you,
For choosing AT&T.
Even as crushing,
As some of these blows were to him,
And as unrealistic as the others,
Might truly have been,
They did nothing,
To dampen his desire,
Or his drive,
To try and get,
Just a few personal moments,
Of her time.
To have a reason,
To look,
Deep in her eyes,
Even if it was only,
While asking her a question,
And waiting for an answer,
He already knew.
Or just to,
Call out her name,
Across the noisy warehouse floor,
Made him feel,
Closer to her,
In some unexplainable,
But very real way.
These little interactions,
Brought on such a feeling,
Of indescribable pleasure,
A feeling deep inside him,
That just seemed right,
Unblemished by any agenda,
Other than just,
Wanting to be around her.
He may go into some weekends,
Hoping to come out changed,
A new man,
Free from this endless orbit,
Around this unattainable girl.
But more weekends,
Than not,
He thinks about the things,
He still hasn't tried,
He has yet to form,
He may end up twisting,
All in order to try,
Just to get,
One step closer,
To Love…

Tom Allen…03-22-2017…