Clouded
What to say, what to feel
Is it true, is it real
Is he gone, can it be
Not my son Lord, please take me
How to feel, how to go on
So many, so many already gone
So hard to see blessing through the pain
Every word of comfort echoes his name
So, so many voices in my head
Not my son Lord, take me instead
Where is the good, why do I live
He had so much more to give
What have I done, is this on me
Are there faults of mine I didn't see
Could I have changed to outcome somehow
I guess it doesn't matter now
I don't understand, I can't even think
With each tap on a key my heart is in sync
Slow and uncertain, no pattern at all
As though standing on air waiting to fall
Clouded thoughts, zero visibility
Help me Lord, I cannot see
I can't think or rationalize
I even write with tears in my eyes
Are these even my words, what am I saying
Am I venting or unconsciously praying
Pray for me Jesus, you said you would
Ask our Father to show me the good
My son, my son, why my son
What is my sin, what have I done
Where is Your mercy, what of Your grace
Break through the clouds, show me Your face
J. Moore
4/9/2013
