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     “Thoughts”
 
He wondered
why
he wasn’t
normal
didn’t feel the
same
as most people
do
about most things
that they have
feelings for
he wanted to
belong
but never could
find
anything
worth belonging
too,
he dragged a
piece of metal
along the whole
length
of a brand new
BMW
pushing hard
against
it’s black body
leaving a paint-less
crease
behind him
as he slowly
walked away
alarm blaring
on the over
priced car
straddling two
parking spaces
why do so
many people
feel so entitled
to more than
their fair share,
he had an
emptiness
in him
a missing piece
to his life’s
puzzle
that must be
more oddly
shaped
then most of
the remaining
pieces
still out there
nothing seems to
come close
to matching
it’s sharp
corners
and dull
edges,
he knew
he was different
not like special
or unique
something leaning
more towards
that stain
you find
on your brand
new couch
you don’t know
what caused it
or what it is
only that it
sticks out from
everything else
around it
and it bothers
you
that it is
there
well
that would be
him,
he stopped
and listened
to an old
man
playing an acoustic
guitar
he gently
plucked the
strings
with a soft
touch
that produced
simple notes
of sound
that when strung
together
had a magical
appeal to him
he pulled a
couple of wadded
up
dollar bills
out of his
pocket
dropping them
into the old man’s
guitar case
as he started
to leave
the man then
nodded to him
while looking into
his eyes
and played a few
notes
that he knew
were meant for
only him
a musical
thank-you,
he had no
goals in his
life
nothing he wanted
to do
or anybody
he wished
he could be
not due to
a lack of
drive
or motivation
he just hasn’t
found
any direction
yet
to call his
own,
why couldn’t
real life
be more like
the game
you always knew
where you stood
in the race
how far you
were
from the finish
line
and whether or
not
you could call
your spin through
life
a success
or failure
all the answers
were
clearly printed
on the inside
of the box,
he turned
the corner
and started to
head for home
no closer to
solving
any of the
questions
that have been
plaguing him
for years
his mind
even more
clouded
then when he
began his walk,
he sees a
young man
in a red
Mercedes SLC-43
convertible
pulling into a
handicap parking
spot
and in one
quick motion
the man grabs
the windshield
and the driver’s
door
and leaps out
of his car
and heads into
a nearby
liquor store
engine running
stereo bumping
“well there is”
“one thing”
“I do enjoy doing”
he says
out loud
“playing karma”
causing a
married couple
going by him
to turn their
heads
thinking he
was talking
to them
he shakes his
head no
back to them
and they continue
on their way
he can’t help
but smile
as he walks
by
the red
Mercedes SLC-43
convertible
with a piece
of metal
in his left
hand
leaving a
paint-less
crease
in his wake…
 
     Tom Allen…12-23-2017…