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     “Never for Him”
 
He was just
lonely
willing to do
most anything
just to be
liked
he began to
wonder
if he was
broken
some of his
more important
parts
missing
from some
personality
rebuild
he can’t remember
going through,
he didn’t
understand
that being
overly
friendly
was seen as
a weakness
too needy
of a person
to be taken
seriously,
nobody wants
what is being
thrown at them
looking more
like
the monkey at
the zoo
hurtling
its shit
at anyone who
comes close to
him,
he was tired
of spending
his days
trying to work
his way up
from acquaintance
to part-time
friend
standing around
hoping she’ll
take a look
his way
before deciding
that she’ll never
have a spot
for him
any where
in her private
game,
why is it
so hard
to find a
starting point
an accidental
meeting
that turns into
a number and
a name
or that girl
you’ve known
for a while
who suddenly
sees you as
more than just
a familiar
face
someone now
who she thinks
she just might
like to get
to know
better,
but for him
casual chance
is just a
myth
nothing ever
just happens
for him
romantic
encounters
like that
don’t really
exist
in his world
so he rarely
takes a shot
at love
or even
friendship
with the odds
stacked
in the way
that they
are,
and when
he
is able to
convince himself
she might like
him
even a little
he buries her
in attention
the immense
weight
of his affection
crushing down
on her chest
till she can’t
breathe
the last little
gasp
of possibility
squeezed out
of her
the relationship
dead
before it has
ever begun,
why can’t his
life
have just a
few
normal pages
in it
where everything
goes according
to script
instead of having                
to live under
a broken sun
in a broken
sky
waiting for
that
one chance
that never
seems to
come
his way…
 
     Tom Allen…07-28-2018…