Tattoos in Mayberry

46,797 poems read

     When published, my best seller
will hack into your reptilian brain
with the force of a terminal 
e-mail virus.
Your new guilty pleasure will be to peruse my book
 in lieu of an after dinner drink,
or a bootleg quaalude.
My manuscript will bait your hook
like breaking news
busting out your picture windows
and punching holes
through your security doors,
stunning your senses 
like a Hillary/Trump hairdo.
So inspired by my best seller
you'll hold a silent vigil 
until the release of the sequel.
My magnum opus will crack into your sensorium
with the force of hail 
one inch in diameter,
while again parting the Red Sea.
Each word and phrase
will perfectly describe
exactly what I intended to say
to solidify my arguments.
My best seller will back into your yard
like a toxic chemical spill
disturbing you by testing your limits
with the fresh vantage point of Jihad.
Deep thinkers,  like bobble heads,
will nod in silent agreement to its relevance and charm.
My best seller will jar you
like an oil tanker derailment
and thus,will be banned
in at least thirty five sovereign nations..
My chapters will shred 
your environmental safety quotient
like a million gallons of agent orange 
dumped onto your organic vegetable garden.
My premises will flatten your illusions
like a screeching freak 
in the front row of a Frank Zappa concert.
My verses will beat at your side door
like a raging, feral, homeless bum
With an iron fist, my work
 will crush you, with meaning.
dismantling your position
 like a cyber thief
draining your bank accounts.
My best seller will sucker punch you
in your Solar Plexus 
so you can't catch your breath
forcing you to abandon your social safety net 
like a nuclear disaster melting down
in your zip code.
My subtexts will be pandemic  
as Monsanto GMO Corn,
while more intoxicating than high
grade, illicit, recreational, marijuana.
Intellectuals and laymen alike
will quote snippets of my book for millennia
in place of John Dunne and Shakespeare
whose writings will no longer seem
as relevant as what I have written about your lives.
After reading my best seller
more young scholars 
will feel the pull to
move off the grid
far up in the high country  
meditating, in Ashrams and communes
where they will seek to discover
their truest selves..
Soldiers, errant assasins,
and big game hunters
will abandon their weaponry
taking vows of poverty and silence
While others will go on prolonged
hunger strikes.
Do you better understand
How as things now stand 
It may be for the best
to put on hold
 the release 
of my undercover
best seller.

Buddy Bee Anthony

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Undercover Best Seller