Just thoughts

I could write a book about the 1000s of ways I call your name
Only to go ignored or tossed aside
You spoke of a bigger picture in earlier days
Was this what you envisioned?
Two lovers so torn that they cannot find one another through the tears they cry and cause
Two places of refuge that housed a blended family now destroyed by a natural disaster
Distraction...distracted from our future
Our train now at a standstill
Deadlocked with another driver
I reversed as you boarded a train that took you to a destination so unfamiliar
You no longer knew what familiar was
Now we both sit in anguish
Pained about how life is
Crying and praying with no direction
The anger sits on my chest
Mostly because you are not there to calm it
Your presence is missed
But I feel like Iím not needed
So with my confidence effed up and my heart shredded
Let it go I canít just let it.
I canít let you go
but I canít make your feet move
You belong to the universe and she let me borrow you
But I broke you
Like I said I wouldnít do
Come back to me so I can show you the real you
Thatís not the plan tho.
Thatís not how life goes.
What the hell do I do now?

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Just thoughts