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Each Day Without You

I still wake each morning only to find,
that you are always the first thing on my mind.
As soon as my eyes open for the day,
I am already sad, because you have gone away.
The second I regain my conscious thought,
I start to think of what is, and also what is not.
The moment my foot hits the cold bedroom floor,
I pray for a good day, knowing I am unable to take much more.
It is a struggle to find a reason to smile,
to catch one is as rare as spotting Vaquita in the wild.
Not yet extinct, but definitely endangered,
feeling emotionally unstable, balancing sorrow with anger.
Facing day after day without you,
has continued to paint me more and more blue.
Bluer than the sky, bluer than the deepest abyss,
I have never known a sadness quite as extreme as this.
Invading and consuming me each day that you are away,
I search constantly for light, in overly dark days.
Each day longer than the last, with nights so cold,
our once warm bed now feels frosty and alone.
Silence echoes through the hallway, reminding me no one is there,
silence can be so very loud, when that is all that you hear.
Coming home every day in suspended anticipation,
for a brief moment, each evening hoping that you will be there waiting.
Knowing that you still have your own house key,
hope that, as I approach our house, your car I will see.
And yet, each day...as I turn onto our street,
seeing the driveway empty, feels like another defeat.
I slowly turn the handle and open the door,
there is silence and darkness, and nothing more.
The desk where you used to work is now empty and dusty,
the flowers still bloom, but you are no longer here to see.
Their beauty is present, but falls on eyes that cannot comprehend,
my senses dulled, ever since you told me it was the end.
Life around me has since lost the element of excitement,
I believe I have already experienced all the joy I will ever get.
Never again will I ever be as happy as I was with you,
now drowning in my sadness, sinking deeper into the blue.


Original Work by: Shawn A.


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Each Day Without You