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 A New Woman

I guess we crossed paths
It was an absolute experience
I learned a lot from my rejections
That why should I feel insecure
Why should I try to change so many things about myself
It never made them feel anything more
It crippled me inside
Seeing all these losers getting attention and I had to be thrown to the wolves
I was eaten half to death
Bleeding and humiliated to the core
I had to nurse myself, nurse all my wounds
I had to stop covering them up and go deep inside
I went through a dark journey of rediscovery and tears
The critical abuse, being told I'm not good enough my whole life
All these wounds resurfaced the more I pushed them away
Until I learned I'm too good for you
I need someone who will be there for me
Who thinks my journey is inspiring and who finds a connection to me
Not through attraction and lust
Petty old silly crushes so when the chemistry wears off we can't even stand each other
I wish I see you in a light that's unattractive
I pray that I forget you
I've had enough and my hearts had enough of being ignored
My soul knows it wants to align, but its not fair to hurt my heart because of you
You're handsome sure, your smile is out of this world
I love your body and your height
I just don't like how you string people along
I know you been hurt, but so have the rest of us
Its not just about you
You're stubborn and selfish
There's this kind of insecurity, but you conceal it with arrogance
It's actually really Unattractive
I see you differently these days
Not knowing what to think anymore
I hate that you starred showing off
You were real simple and you feel you need to measure up to others
It's just materialistic
I don't like it
I'm actually starting to rebel against my soul
If you don't even have the decency to even say things, but this sadness is in your eyes
I don't get it
Say something or don't look at me at all
I'm done
I've always been kind and patient
But this is ridiculous
Ignoring, ghosting, unblocking like I wouldn't notice
I did notice
Then the complete silence
This is what put me off
It was never about the other girls or women
I get it you're a man you can't hold yourself
I get the pressure
But I don't get why you had to treat me bad
Then feel bad afterwards
You wanna know something I was an idiot
I thought you were actually a nice guy
Maybe you are not
I kept making excuses, but unfortunately
You're in my eyes definitely not like me at all
An Empath feels for others
They don't ignore ore because we think how much it will hurt people
But you're the opposite of an Empath
So I can't look at you
Not anymore
Not without pain
Good luck she's out there somewhere
I just hope she's not a narcissist
Who will lie, steal and cheat and blame you







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