We are human and frail
And it really is no shame,
When we make the odd mistake,
To accept and take the blame.
It seems it's different in America
Land of the brave, home or the free,
With a particularly virulent version
Of what we call No Win, No Fee.
A person, for want of a better term,
It seems drove up in her car
And purchased a hot drink
From a drive through Coffee Bar,
Wedged the cup between her thighs
As without a thought she drove away
And from such banal stupidity
History was made that very day.
Some hot drink got spilled,
Her legs got somewhat burnt,
And her wealth somewhat grew
From the damages she earned.
What America did yesterday
We adopt the very next day
That seems to be the creed
Of the No Win No Fee way.
So, when these days I buy a coffee
It's served to me luke warm or cool
Just in case I go and burn myself
Like that transatlantic female fool.
It's against my human rights
I really do sincerely think
To be condemned to be sold
Any just warm or tepid drink.
I like my coffee strong and hot so
So am quite prepared to say
Its my own stupid fault
If I burn myself one day.
It is really such a disgrace,
A matter of great shame,
To profit from our stupidity by
Making others take the blame.
