Ben
It is strange not having you in my life
to know that I won’t see your smile
that I won’t hear your laughter echo through the walls.
That you and Jack will not go for walks together
and race each other up and down the old country road behind my home, seeing who is the fastest, again.
Not being able to watch you grow and learn of life
to be a part of that life is my greatest pain.
Every night I still say goodnight to you and in my mind I can hear you say “goodnight granddad I love you”.
I no longer go into your room, it only makes me cry.
But I do look at video’s sometimes and pictures that we took together and laugh then cry at the same time.
My life is different now that we have been separated and I no longer get to see you or spend time with you.
There is always a feeling of something missing
a hole where there should be none.
An emptiness that I know can never be filled until you are older and come find me yourself…
and no matter how many years we are kept apart
I will always be here waiting for my grandson to find me
so we can carry on where we left off.
I will always love you Benjamin Samuel Sweeden
