I been running from this feeling
Far too long
I can't explain it
I can only label it
Is it post traumatic stress
Am I picking up something?
Is this a virus and why has it not attacked my sinuses?
Only so little understand
The sensitivities of a raw empathic ocean
Like a strong current pulling your intestines inward
Until you want to throw up the hostility
Your head tied up into knots
Your throat wants to scream words you don't recall
A feeling of faint and dizziness
Picking up butterflies of nerves
A Warm acidic strong current gushing outward
You have no control over
It seems you're crying and your heart hurts
It drips like the rim of a teacup
A feeling of entrapment to whom you thought you were
To who you always wanted to be
You can't breathe, you feel tired
Even if you slept so good
Those strong currents pull you into a vortex
Like you're drowning in other people's feelings
Their thoughts and emotions
You feel their Envy, hatred and jealousy
If there is love its so beautiful you want it to last forever
Nobody's energy was like my dad's
It was the purest, most loving and beautiful of all
I searched for it my whole life and never found it in 24 years