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I'm afraid

Routine scares me.
Not to say I don't want it.
Not being reassured....
Unfortunately I'm gonna ask a million times and I need you to tell me a million and one
Just to be on the safe side.
I just messed up a good home.
Healthy environment for our kids.
Love and nourishment lived there.
I just messed up both of our support systems in each other.
I just walked away from a woman I adored and loved.
Because I allowed my emotions to run away.
Consume my thoughts and I ran with them.
I feel awful.
If this is truly what I wanted I would be happy.
I wouldn't feel bad.
I wouldn't even look back but it isn't that I wanted to be free.
Everything was looking unfamiliar and terrifying
I put things that way.
We were happy.
I shifted away from love.
It's making me sad af.

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I`m afraid