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 Climb the highest mountain, punch the face of god


I wish I could do it all differently.
I seem to have fudged it all up on my first try.
All I did was lie around in depression,
No one helped me to get out of it.
High school is but a memory now.
All I can do is wish to go back to the beginning,
See what I f**ked up.
I used to drive my friends around,
Till I found out they weren't my friends,
They just needed a ride.
They all said they would miss me,
And they said they would call,
But no one calls me.
No one ever has.
Last year was my first year in school
And I got kicked out of the house so many times.
My gramparents, they are my true savior,
They would help me when no one cared to.
I used to see myself doing
Great things in the future but here I am,
My life is hell and I haven't a job.
All I ever did in my grammar school days
Was cry a quiet storm of tears,
No one ever heard me. It was something I couldn't allow.
They would laugh at me, they were always laughing at me.
No one ever tried to take me serious,
Because I was the fat girl.
And I always will be.
All them so-called friends I grew up with,
They have at least 3 kids and I
Always wanted a kid of my own,
Because I was lonely,
But I'll be glad I waited.
My vendetta in life is that I have to suffer
In order to see all the good;
In order to obtain all the good.
I see this as a useless struggle,
But here I am,
I have to keep on keepin' on,
I'm desperate for some good,
But I'm so depressed, I cannot get off my ass.

December 20, 2003

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