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Water, Water, Everywhere!There's water, water everywhere, Its all over me bed, do I care? Yes I do, cos am really fed up… I'm drowning with me overflowing cup! Me ceiling burst and I got it fixed, Then it burst again, am all betwixed! I got me landlord outa his bed, ‘Cor blimey am tired!' Is what he said! ‘Well you gota come here!' Did I scream and shout, ‘There's water everywhere, aint no doubt!' ‘It's down the walls and all over me bed!' ‘So get your backside here right now!' I said! I was so upset, I ran outside, Sat on the wall and cried and cried! I hammered on the flat above me, And told them to get down here and see! I thought their pipe had burst overhead, Through their ceiling, onto me bed! The landlord came and oh dear me, ‘Don't know what it is!' He said to me! ‘You better sort it lad, and fast!' I said, ‘Or you won't need sleep, you'll end up dead!' He was all bog eyed and his hair a mess, No need to wonder why or to guess! It's cos I woke him outa his bed! Well that's just tough! It has to be said! At least he can go home and get tucked in bed! But me, I can't, got nowhere to rest me head! His parting shot was, ‘I'll be back tomorrow!' While I just hung me head in sorrow… I sauntered to the living room, oh woe is me! Where can I sleep, there's no other bed you see! So I decided to sod it and I went to bed, And I slept on a bin-bag – ‘Oh gawd!' I said! What a to-do, oh, cor blimey, oh flippin' ‘eck, I'm gona ring me landlord Andy's neck! But I think I will wait till all me jobs are done, Then I will kill him, and do it in fun! And when things go wrong in this flat of mine… I'll get a repair man who has the time! Cos Andy never has the time to spare, That's cos he's fixing holes and leaks, everywhere! :o) Poetry Ad-Free Upgrades Vote for this poem
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