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He's Lost The Plot…He has you know, lost the plot, Cos when I went to see him today… He got all me info wrong! Blimey, what can I say! I told him, I did, I said to him; ‘Oi, you've got it all me info wrong!' He smiled a smirk, looked at me, And said he wouldn't be long! ‘Long!' I said, ‘What are you on about?' He turned to me again… And with a twinkle in his eyes… He told me I was insane! Well of course, I didn't need to know that, Cos at the end off the day… I'm the only one with my mind, So there aint nothing much more to say! But it aint my mind that's in focus here, It's this old fella that I know… His name used to be Adrian… But I re-named that nutter ‘po!' He told me he's not a telly tubby, Well, ok, so maybe he's not…! But at the end of the day, the fact remains, That surgeon should be shot! He had to sort me giblets out… Dear me, he's a flippin' pain… Cos every time I see him… I'm all messed up again! I'm sure he's short of a few bob, Cos he don't make much money! So I guess he needs the overtime… (Now isn't that too funny)! I think that his secret mission was… He's a needle worker in the night! Cos you wana see my scars…oh wow! They are really outa sight! I can see him now, I can… Sitting there in school… Sewing away, every day… Following the very strict school rule! Rule number one goes like this; To sew always on a straight line, And as long as you don't deviate, You should get along just fine! Rule number two goes like this; To make sure the stitches can't be seen, So that when you make a mistake, You won't tell, if you know what I mean! Rule number three goes like this; To make sure you don't pull the thread! Cos if you do, cor blimey lad… You're just might end up dead! So there was Po, sitting sewing… Just as a good little boy should do! And although he got top marks… His blanket stitching does show through! So no more blanket stitching you! Just tough invisible mending please, Cos after all, when said and done, I don't wana snap every time I sneeze! Poetry Ad-Free Upgrades Vote for this poem
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