I tried to reach him today,
but he's already packing "us" away.
I tried to hold his hand,
but it was stiff and un-wielding.
I tried to ask where he would live,
gave him a paper about the
way we could make things work.
I spent a couple hours
writing that paper in a way
I thought would be in-offensive,
and I'm sure he never even
unfolded or read it.
I tried to reminisce about
the last date we had together,
but I could tell that he was
trying hard not to remember.
When we drove by the golf course,
I laughed and said I could
picture his swing, the way
he wiggled his butt~ silence.
I dug my nails into my leg
to try to keep from crying,
and when a few stray tears
escaped, I looked out my window.
I felt nauseated and
shut my eyes so I wouldn't
have to ask him to pull over.
I said, "Thank you for
taking me with you today.
I'm going to miss this,
driving with you."
He sped back,
not wanting to deal
with any emotions.
I really needed a hug,
but he gave me a
quick peck of a kiss
and hurried inside...
already trying to pack
the memory of us
into an overnight
luggage bag,
but the memory
is too big.
