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Gunfighter Ballad for a  Modern World

He was the world's last gun fighter
And he always worked in drag
Carrying his six shooters
In a special velvet bag
No boots and spurs to jingle
As in to town he rode
Just patent leather sling backs
High heeled and open toed
He always arrived early
Before the heat of the sun
Always very careful
His mascara didn't run
And when he'd done the job
Left the body on the ground
He always left so quickly
Never hung around
The world's last gunfighter
He always earned his fee
Always in the morning so
As not to disturb his tea
Then carefully slipped back
Into his other life
A gas fitter in Cheltenham
With two kids and a wife
While the police of the world
Who really didn't know
Hunted the femme fatale
Of his alter ego
When the next summons came
In the want ads of the Times
He'd don his Dior dresses
And kill just one more time
Well it helped to pay the mortgage
And kept food on the table
And a mans got to do
Just what he's able




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Gunfighter Ballad for a Modern World