Looking out my window
I see nothing but a heavy fog
It wombs over the land in a heavy load
But yet it does not offer me protection
It subjects a feeling of dismal pain and rejection
As I stare out the window and past my reflection
I ask myself many of questions.
Am I doomed to be like that in a consistent dense oblivion
Without any recollection of the outside existence?
Will I be condemned to never knowing how I want my life
Or what I wish to do in my life?
As for now as always I cannot make up my mind
I enjoy doing some things but they do not make me truly happy.
But for true ecstasy I wish more.
I want the fog of entrapment of my mind
To just dissipate from utter existence
And open up to my mind a new spectrum of desires.
Let the great beam of heavenly light shine down
And blast away the feelings of constriction and suffocation
I want to be able to give a predetermined shout out of what I like
I want everyone to know what delightful plans I have for my own future.