We used to be together
when things were innocent
and we didn't know how
to question love yet...
I wore your diamond
but we never walked
down the aisle.
Your mom thought
you needed to be on your own,
backpack around Europe,
finish your Army duty,
finish law school...
You did all that,
and when I saw her~
was it last year?~
she sighed and said
she wished that you
would settle down and marry,
and she looks at me with
tears in her eyes,
and I can't look back.
We made it complicated,
thought love should be
more ideal, more fairytale,
listened to everyone else's
shoulda, coulda, wouldas.
We have tried to reunite
so many times, always
coming to the conclusion
that we're better off as friends.
It's your conclusion,
same story as everyone else's.
You got hurt by love,
and were never going to
take that chance again.
So, last week when you
stopped for coffee on your
way back to Chicago...
you had a late case in court
and could only stay for
(two and a half hours)...
It felt platonic,
talking about current relationships,
you always the rationalist,
the advisor, the good friend.
I was completely comfortable
until you went to leave,
giving me one of "those hugs"
in which neither one of us
wanted to let go, just
standing there in each others arms
for ten, maybe fifteen minutes...
and I felt you tremble as
my heart flip-flopped,knew
you'd never admit it but
you felt the same way.
We will always be friends,
and the reason for my
feeling that way
when you hug me will always
be the question with no answer.
