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Fred, Oh Unique One…He is you know, unique, Cos he's a very nutty man! Thinks he's better that the females, And tells us he has a plan! He tries to tell the staff off! But fails badly in his quest! Cos I have to say, at the end of the day, His decorum aint the best! So the girls all laugh at him… And watch him squirm away! He aint all that, they'll knock him flat! So he always scuttles away! He tells me that he's quite fat! And he blames it on the women! Cos they feed him tea and biscuits! And it aint good for any slimmin'! So Fred, you're fat and bald you know! Cos you told me this one day! Actually, you tell me every time, And when I popped into your shop this day! And your shirt size has increased by far! And now you're struggling with the door, Cos it don't open that wide! Oh Fred, you just can't take no more! So stop with the cakes and biscuits! Cos it's bad for your complexion you know! And after all, when said and done! You're figures gona go! Oh, oh dear me dear Fred, You're figures gone already! So stop that eating rubbish! Cos you aint walking steady! Cos your flob-a-lob is in the way, And it's rolling from side to side! But then again, I have to say! You sure aint got no pride! Cos you've also got a baldy head! And what about your nose! (Oh blimey, is that a secret Fred)? Well it don't matter I suppose! So short, fat and baldy, oh Fred! What a sight to see! But hey, I think am only joking? Now where's your biscuit and cuppa tea? Around Your Waist Silly! Poetry Ad-Free Upgrades Vote for this poem
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