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Oh Dear Me Mr Warden!Oh dear me Mr Warden, Can you help me in my plight? Cos I got a parking ticket, And now I won't sleep at night! You see, I went to a real posh meeting; The DDA, don't ya know! And so off I went to the Museum, For a disability meeting that I had to go. I parked my car in the ‘Museum car park,' Well; I thought that's what it was… But; oh glory be - and sugar plumbs! Was I in such a right tiz woz!! You see, I got a parking ticket, And I almost died of shock! I nearly fell outa me wheelchair! And bashed me head on a rock! For there sitting on my window; (You should have seen the tears in my eyes)! Was a flippin' parking ticket! ‘Oh blimey! Oh no!' I cried! I didn't put me badges in me window, What a silly thing for me to do! I didn't even see the box thing! So that's why I write to you! You see, it's a bit like this; I'm a bit knackered don't ya know! So I have to have a little help, To these places that I have to go! So there I was sitting patiently, Waiting for the staff to get me inside, Cos I can't get me wheelchair on me own, (And anyway, I've got no pride)! Cos I don't care who helps me! As long as I get to where I need to go, So the staff popped out to take me in, To this posh meeting don't ya know! So I sat there all a dither, Thinking and panicking and in a sweat! And when it was over I saw the parking ticket, Which I didn't know I'd get!' So there I was, like I said, Sitting in me chair, feeling really sick, I almost nearly fainted! And nearly hit me head on a brick!!! I didn't know it was a normal car park, And I really wouldn't mind! Cos I usually always show me badges! Cos I'm really helpful and kind! But alas, I didn't show them today… And now, oh hell, oh glory be! I've got this flippin' fine to pay! So can you please, Mr Warden, help me? And no matter where I am from now! I promise you that no matter what, I'm gona show them blue flippin' badges! Cos after all, I should be shot! I'm at a disability discrimination act meeting; (DDA), oh woe is me! I'll have to sell me brand new l wheelchair; To pay this parking fee; Cos I did a really stupid thing… And now I'll pay the price! But in future, no worries, That badge will be on show in a thrice! So dear Mr Warden, Sir, Can you help me in my plight today? Cos I really have to say it, I'm not feeling at all ok! Cos does this mean I get some points? Cos I aint never had them before! And I have to admit; I panicked! Cos I really don't know the score! Now if you can't help me I understand, (But I think I'm gona cry), But that's ok, I've got a hankie, To dry me flippin' eye! Now if you didn't know it, I'm a poet don't ya know! And this is now on me website's… On the internet all on show! It's All Gud Though Innit!!! Poetry Ad-Free Upgrades Vote for this poem |
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