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Every Minute, Of Every Hour, Of Every Day…Every minute of every hour of every day, Pain is all I have! Every minute of every hour of every day, Pain is all I see! Every minute of every hour every day, I ask for mercy from He! Every minute of every hour of every day, I ask to be a little pain free! Pain is my future for the rest of my life... Can't do it, but I've got no choice! I know He could help me if He wanted too, And yes, I've used my voice! I asked Him in the dark of night, To help me with this pain, But as usual, He didn't – Now I'm in a mess again! I cried last night, and I hate to do that, It makes me feel weak and pathetic! Why can't He ease this pain of mine? And give me a spine made of prosthetic! I'm floundering; I really am, Because this pain gets worse by the day, I've cried an ocean of tears in bed, And begged for help this day! My chronic days were bad enough, But the worse chronic ones are as worse as can be, Why, oh why, oh why is this happening? Why does He give this burden to me? I tell myself that I won't cry, that I'm tough, I'm not a wimp, so no more tears from me ever! Well, what can I say, but it doesn't work! I think I'll be crying forever! I don't know quite what to do? I'm struggling more than I can bear! And where is my God when I need Him so? Cos He never seems to be there!! I feel like the answer must be yes I'm a weak! Because my strength gets zapped in a blink! So tired am I, its no wonder I cry, I'm so messed up I can't even think… I can't think ahead to the future… It scares me to death at the thought! This pain I bear, oh God how it hurts, Its solace from God that needs to be sought! But once again in the dark of night, I asked for His divine intervention! And once again, He must be elsewhere, I wonder it is something I should mention! Because though at times in my life- I have begged and pleaded for pain release, He never gives me a taste of that luxury; He just won't let my pain cease! How am I supposed to go through my life like this? This pain is more than I can bear! And where is my God, where has He gone? And more, does He even care? So once more in the dark of night I cry, I ask for help, for support for this pain! For if I have to live my life like this, It's going to drive me insane! My worse days are now the better days, And the chronic ones are off the wall! I need ease; I need help!! Why oh why won't He answer my call? Am I being so very selfish? I know there are people worse than me, But at this moment, that thought doesn't help, For agony is all I can see! My spine pain is out of control so much, Now my hands and fingers are bent! They're swollen and hurt like nothing on earth, But my words are my life, Heaven sent! What if I can't type or write any more? How the hell will I cope! Because my words are my life, they keep me strong, Without that, I have no hope! So send me some divine intervention Lord, Please ease this plight, this pain, Before it tips me over the edge, Because it's sending me totally insane! Can't stand it, cant deal with it, Can't see an end to my plight! So once again, I will ask my God, For help me in the dark of night. I count my blessings, I really do, I never take life for granted at all, It's just getting harder by the day, And I feel like God isn't answering my call… But there is nothing I can do about that, Except pray to him once again, And hope against hope, that He can help; Help me to deal with this damned bloody pain! Because He's All I've Really Got! And nope, its not about self pity, its about... Don't know really, being honest I guess... I'm not hiding it, cos thats too difficult now. Used to be able to hide the pain, now I can't. So I guess my mask finally slipped. Still got the constitution to go on though, Just don't know for how long. I guess that's life eh. Swings and roundabouts. Poetry Ad-Free Upgrades Vote for this poem
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