had so many dreams
too many dreams
I guess
cuz
now I watch as they
all fade
fade away
What's next for me?
just want some clue
some way to rest assured
some way to know
I'll be O.K.
I love music
but I must have neglected it too
as I have most things
as I see it evade me
all things
must
come to an end
I suppose
but I didn't think
I didn't think
it would end
like this
nothing real to show and
nowhere
with nowhere to go
no love for my soul
just people
chasing their own
dreams
and making them
all come true
now I am confused
Have I sinned that far down?
to trap me here
silently watching
eternally suffering
as a constant solitude
stuck here in this
"temple"
feels more like a
PRISON CELL
Am I jaded
or simply becoming aware
of what I have denied?
I must have died
years ago
when I felt the pain and sorrow
when I gave my life away
Did I choose right or wrong?
Is the North star lost all along?
Is it even the North star I followed?
searching for you
I wonder if anyone even knows
what I am saying
now
I don't even really care
I'll just say how I feel
and hope one day
they can spin the reel
and understand
it's something so much more
than a weekend plan
or a minute on a stage
much more than a belief
but living as a reality
inside me
maybe I was wrong
maybe it isn't in me anymore
maybe I have lost that key
the eternal salvation
we were promised
maybe it doesn't matter
but my heart longs
longs for something greater
I still reach for
something these people might see
and cause them too to believe
it's all right
it's all right
it's all right
everything's a mystery
still searching for the key
that key that'll free
and give us sanity
something more than
these broken dreams
we should all be
those stars in which we see
ourselves
if only we could all
break the mold
that cold frozen
invisible wall
that binds us
from reaching the top
honestly
with our own integrity
and hearts that shine
more beautifully than
diamonds
for that is what I see
in those that reach
for the truth
those that sacrifice
themselves
so others may find
sanctuary
or
satisfaction
for nothing is more pleasant
than being satisfied
and mesmerized
smiling happy
with lit cigarette
and the arm of a lover
'round the neck
smiling into love
laughing at the pain
making it all go away
and never faking happiness
not even for one more day
