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Part IV - Not today

Part IV and final part of this journey with Shell Heller

Do you know how it is to shine inside?
I do, I have and once again I am.
Some say that there are no mistakes but
I have made them and they hurt

This was different oh so very different
My mind jumbled scrambled all awhirl
I have been a wanderer
Have had my pick of girls
Have loved and smiled
And walked away
But not this time somehow
Not today

When skin is crawling cold with touch,
An after-taste of soul sickness
On skin that cannot bear to face the sky
Lest its taint should kill the stars

Always a feeling of tenderness
A sense of body peace
A sort of amiable gratitude
For the one who gave release
A sort of sense withdrawal
Before I walked away
So we parted amicably
But not today

Do you know what it means to souljoin?
I know that you are listening,
Already lightyears in advance of me
Already laughing at the idea

Our loving was electric
She set my body on fire
I have never never before
Experienced such desire
I cannot bear to leave her
I can't walk away
It just isn't right
No not today

Of linear and you know already how
I soar in your flightwings,
In your heart that cannot, will not
Open for just anyone

This was a joining of the spirit
As we lay together
We soared and dived and flew
She took me to the ether
I want her oh I want her
I can't walk away
Maybe in the future
But no not today

And right here and now I ache with
My soul's love for you
And all the creation that we are
Please stay with me

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Part IV - Not today