In the corner of my mind sits a bag of lonely thoughts
wondering what I could've done differently to enhance my life
I feel so ashamed that I didn't stay in my children lives
I was a coward, I let her raise them all alone
she gave them what I refused, a stable home
and in return they gave her love and joy, and as for me, I barley
even got a phone call...
but at least they recognize me as their dad..
their mother raise them with all she had
and I know when she looks at me
it makes her mad, but mostly sad..
because I missed out on a bundle of joy
two girls and a baby boy..
never once did I give her a dime
on a meal, never ask if she needed help on
paying a bill...I was to busy rolling with my boys
playing with remote control toys..
hitting the clubs trying to catch up with a honey
letting the tricks in the street take my money
now that I look back I don't see nothing funny
I wasn't around for birthdays, and till this day
I don't even know their ages...
all I know is that they're now grown...
and on me, they have turned the pages...
I watch their mother struggle to
raised them on minimum wages...
a lonely tear trails down my face..
as I think about how I let my life go to waste..
nothing I've done, was worth losing my kids
I wish I could take back the things I did
the drugs, the clubs, the girls the wine...
if I could only reach back in the hands of time
but I can't, I'm just stuck with these
lonely thoughts in the corner of my mind