I caught up with a friend of mine recently. I'd seen him before now, but only on T.V. He was famous now and got tons of publicity.
I step back and said, "Let me get a good look at you. "What brings you my way, just passing through?"
He says, "No, I gotta proposition for you. Let's swap lives, me & you. While you've got mine you can do as you desire. While I've got yours, I'll kick back, relax, write and retire. Now, I know you got problems… hell, we all do, but what I wouldn't give to do what you do."
Well, that got me wondering. Because why would you want to be or try to be something you could never be… something you may not want to be. Now you say you want to be like me, but you only judge this by my poetry.
You don't see my hearts agony or my fear of publicity. Not my problems socially or my battles with insanity. Not the problems within me personally; those scars of my soul that cut so deeply, it would take the Hubble just to peep me. And it's not that I shroud these things in secrecy. I just work them out secretly. There's issue after issue being me, but you want my reality?
Through my faults I've been me the best I can be and strive only to be a better me despite my flaws, my pain, and my history. See, the grass always looks greener on the other side, but you don't see the trials it had to abide. Even when I said I was happy I lied. My heart bled so much it shriveled and dried. There were no tears in my eyes to be cried because I felt as though my soul had died. Now I'm being conned and swindled by you? You just lied… trying to lure me to your greener side.
Enticing me making it look all so lovely, when in reality, you want me to have the hand you were dealt. And to be burdened with all the pain you've felt. Now there's no more room to notch your belt because, you can't even play the hand you're dealt. So, you dress it up and deal it to me.
"I gotta ocean view & wide screen T.V. Money up the wha-zoo & a nice little hunny, people waitin' hand and foot on me and 30 acres or so of good ole Mary behind my multi-million dollar property. So what do you say, is it a deal, buddy?"
Well now I'll admit it was quite tempting, but why was he so desperately attempting. My life is but a feeble thing, then I remembered, things are deeper than they seem. You've lived your life like a dream, yet you'd throw away this magnificent theme? For what; so you could live a less complex dream?
And everyone says, "Oh you're so lucky," but they don't see the animosity for your fame, your life, and your family. The pain of your reality, especially in the privacy of your own sanctuary where theses same people claim they want to be because; unbeknownst to anybody is the constant blows of tragedy. And while your forced smile might say, I'm happy. Life is hell in reality, but I'm not suppose to look suspiciously when you present this offer too me?
Well, finally ladies and gentlemen I said to him, "I'm in my own little hot spot and I can barely deal with the problems I got. So, to put myself in your spot and take on the problems that you got; I don't think I could I'd rather not." He says, "I only offer this once. So this chance is your last." I just smile and say, "No thanx. I'll pass."