Sometimes I have to decorate
It is a job I hate
Through prompting; nagging by the wife
And only for a peaceful life
The old wallpaper I start to strip
Soak with soapy water and begin to rip
Soon the walls are bare but what a caper
Chunks of plaster removed by the scraper
Now its time to paint the ceiling
I tackle this job uneasy feeling
If I let the paint on carpet drip
The wife she will rip
Up at me she will holler
Watch what you are doing with that roller
I sandpaper wood for the paint
Now I think that this is quaint
How easy the paint will run
Down my arms; now that's no fun
When I've finished with the gloss
The wife is standing looking cross
Look at this; just take note
You've missed a bit you silly goat
I mix the paste; it's far too thin
Tip up the bag and put more in
The wife again her feet will stamp
You've that paste as thick as champ
I cover paper with the paste
To hang it up I now haste
The paper then begins to tear
As I stand on wobbly chair
And oh dear me; it would make you bawl
Getting that paper on the wall
I line it up; I brush it down
My brow is creased in a frown
Beads of sweat; I'm in trouble
There appears another bubble
Next piece up; my head I scratch
I cannot get the pattern to match
The paper then I try to slide
But on the wall it will not glide
Now with insanity I am flirting
It does not even reach the skirting
A little short; oh what pleasure
The wrong length I did measure
The job is finished; but there are new fixtures
On the walls a dozen more pictures
To hide what faults you can guess
As painter and decorator I don't impress
But God is the greatest decorator I know
All His handiwork is there on show
He paints the sky in shades of blue and grey
And patterns of clouds changes every day
See the fields of carpets green
Then in the winter the whitest seen
And oh what colours he paints the flowers
And rainbows hang after showers
It would take too long to tell
How He does all things well
As on His decor I would gaze
For all its beauty I give Him praise
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